c h o c o l a t e c i g a r

moved.

2008-09-22T02:13:00.002+08:00

Note for all peepers! I've moved (think "blogger murtad").

will the next tym be the same mistake?

2008-01-03T01:47:00.000+08:00

Dear Diary,

hahaha. ok, cut the crap. I don't even start a "dear diary" for my hardcopy diary entries in a hardcover diary - duh! - and to think i'd want to add to the formality. huahuahua

I was such a dumbass to decline the offer. WHat te hell was I thinking?? A joke?? Well, on my part, it's a "joke". Terlajak perahu, boleh diundur, not wen terlajak kata...

Only then I thought, "what the fuck sia Ayn..... That's it la hokayyyy.... Next is when??? You don;t even know...Fark it, u stupid idiot" . teared. my bad.

.
.
.

And I badly missed us.

It's nothing like we used to be

2007-12-24T19:21:00.000+08:00

I thought I was strong. Strong enough to endure all obstacles. But I didn't know I am such a weakling.

Days passed.But I couldn't seem to strengthen myself. Since the statement was passed, I'm becoming unsure.My heart's been broken. Too shattered that each time I reminisce, only tears will wake me up. Have I been dreaming all along? So what went wrong?

Nature made it that I should be smiling, looking happy.But deep inside, no one can fathom. Is it only me, clinging on to the memories? Is it only me, who thinks hope is the only way out of this mess, I "unknowingly" pushed myself into?

God, help me.. Each day, I'm full of worries.I wonder if I can make it through the days, until God knows when. At the same time, I was hoping we could minimise the straints.

Tell me, what is the way out? I wanna quit this charade we're playing. Be back to what we used to be. Cuz time, is not doing us any good. And before things get wayyy too complicated and too late, pls resolve this.

p/s: I missed you.

dah tak penting.

2007-12-15T01:39:00.000+08:00

Let this be random.

What used to be so fun, is getting boring. What used to be pure innocence is getting more nonsensical. They are only humans, right?

Tu lahh..jadi orang, kepo sgt kan? Dah kata berkali-kali, bukannye tidak, dah set reminder pon kat hp, masih degil lagi.. Apa nak jadi...

Ouh well, but truth is, people around me has either been getting mushy-er or brokenhearted-er. Or is it that Ayn is not as sentimental, or romantic by nature? (Duh..my AGE CHARACTER CALCULATOR doesnt state so.) What is happening to the world, babe?

Ok, whatever.

Next.

Binget bole? Can laaa.. Pls pls pls.. Ouh well, whatever it is, pray for a miracle to befall on u ok? Another choice is, "undur" suahh..

And I missed the little girl I used to date alot. Way back then.Miss me little girl? Cuz I do. Been some time since we meet. Perhaps, if we meet, will we have anything to talk? *sobs*

And I admit that no matter how long-winded, or crappy, I still do regularly visit some of my favourite blogs. Be it on blogger, multiply, or myspace.

Random kan.. Exit laaa..

p/s: i miss u.

sakit berjangkit

2007-12-07T11:42:00.000+08:00

Bingit.

Hati sakit.

Jiwa perit.

Hilang manis, hilang pahit.

Tinggal tawar.

Kulai layu jambangan mawar.

Bukan lagi merah menyala.

Tapi hitam pekat menular.

Henti kita di garis lintang.

Mungkin tamat sudah permainan.

Apakah kita akan pulang?

Tutup sebuah kisah perjalanan?

For what used to be called Dek Sari~

2007-11-17T19:37:00.000+08:00

It's finally over and done with. Unlike past years, this time, I didnt have much thinking to do. But more of worry. Worry the girls might screw up, worry the audience won't be entertained, worry the show did not work well.Everyone's got their own worries. But the girls pulled thru.

This is not a speech to anyone. Not even a speech to shed tears for. True, Fid, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.And for that, for what I've gone thru with Nira, definitely has made me stronger than before.

Applause received with many thanks to audience who still believe in Nira, whose support is very much appreciated.For those, who came, the alumnis of Nira whom I didnt get to meet, I missed you girls. I missed performing with you girls.If only we could make it for Khatu later this year..But i'll be joining you girls soon. Very soon. As soon as Khatu starts. I'll be sitting and watching for surprises from Nira. And if I do shed any tear, I hope it'll be tear of reminiscence and happiness.

Where burden was felt by me alone, now I'm seeing them sharing the load I used to carry. And I'll assure myself that you girls will make me proud for, now, you know that you can stand on your own feet. Kudos to you Naq n Sai. And all those that has helped. I am not great, mistakes made and learnt from. And I what want for this Nira, is to be better than previous times. Grow from your mistakes.

I've come all the way, not to see you girls falling down and crying hard of regrets. Because you girls are fresh start. And because the time when Nira was only a smoke break for fellow performers, has ended.

My hopes for you girls this Khatu, make me sitting down there proud of you; proud that I was there performing and now you girls will too. Its never about winning. And do not feel pressured by your fellow competitors, because they are just like you, to learn from mistakes made.

Ingat kawan2, usah diikut resmi jagung...

My only regret is that I could not perform for a competition set written by Fid.

"Biarlah harum jambangan Puspa, natijahnya manis, semanisnya Nira"

Randomness

2007-11-02T10:15:00.000+08:00

1.On the outside.
Name: Zanessa Ayn Hudgens
Birthdate: 22 march 87
Current Status: tgh tgu duit masok bole g shopping eh.. spree bnyk menanti ni..
Eye colour: brown black
Hair Colour: brown.

2.On the inside.
My heritage: boyanese-arab-indian kain tepong
My fears: the Almighty
My weaknesses: insecurity
My perfect pizza: meat lover's!

3.yesterday, today, tomorrow.
My first thought of waking up: what time is it?!
My bedtime: no consistent timeing. i slp whenever i want to.
My most missed memories: our honeymoon period.

4.My pick.
Pepsi or coke: coke light zero cal
Macdonalds or Burger King: BK
Single or group dates: single arh.
Adidas or Nike: adidas
Tea or Nestea: teh peng katai
Vanilla or Chocolate: chocolate
Cappucino or Coffee: cappu. mocha bole?

5.Do you?
Smoke: yes.socially.
Curse: yes.my mth needs to shut up.
Take a shower:duh.
Have a crush: on? Zaec efron uh. abey tak tau..da nama ku ayn hudgens..
Go to school: not anymore, but yuh.tp or wrp jer.
Believe in yourself: yep.sumtimes paranoia gets the btr of my confidence.

6.In the past
Drink alcohol: nak mampos kapper? no. jijik!
Gone to the mall: ahh ari tues tu ader org nmpk aku kat TM la nyahh..dgn satu jantan. dgr2 aku jadi superman dr raffles pl klua keje kul 6 fly to TM. how narrow-minded of u ppl to think i'd cheat on my bf. just bcoz u do, dun say i do too. (wahh mengamok nampak! mengamok nampak!)
Dyed your hair: cen i change to blue black?

7.Have you ever..?
Played a stripping game: no.
Change who you were to fit in: at times i had to. lyk a masquerade.well, dats f-ing lyf, we cant be ourselves to pls others. bcoz if i do, i dun always leave a gd 1st impression, n i dun f-ing care.

8.Are you hoping to
Get married: yerp.

9.In a partner
Best eye colour: blue arh. kan zac efron blue.
Best hair colour: brown
Long or short hair: short but unkempt.yes, dat out-of-bed hairdo.

10.What were you doing?
A minute ago: sipped my teh cino ais
An hour ago: tgh lepak kat printrm
A Month ago: 1 oct? keje arh
A Year ago: served my internship @ CAAS. rindu!!

FINALLY..Finish the sentences..
I love: goin shopping wif lotsa cash in hand.
I hate: slanderisms.
I hide: my secrets.
I miss: our 1st months 2gether.n times together minus of course those ppl not wanting to see us together, congratulating him on surviving me.
I need: a confidante.

-

I need a confidante. And I was bein random. And, I blog because I was bored. No work. I was done with work. And I'm itching to go shopping, get prezzies for the Nov oldies... I still have no idea what to get them. Susahla pulak nak belikan org tua hadiah egh... The moms..And the bro.. blerghhh.. Asek aku jer kasi org hadiah.. Aku ni tak dpt2 hadiah yg yg diingini. Hah... (Dah memberi nak harapkan balasan..)

Ouh btw, updates! Eid was average for me. Wasnt even anticipating for it. Ntah arh. Boring jer. Mebe once da start kasi duit raya lagi boring egh.. Raya outing with fams was fun ; that is if our two fams go 2gether.My total family!! Raya outing with frens was fun as well. Joke helium Aiman terngiang2 aku.. All sorts of accident. Moral of the story: Jangan ketawakan samping orang, kan da hilang kerongsang.

So far its been all peaceful n nice for me; except for a few hiccups.Nasib bulan raya. Aku mahapkan, tapi tetap tak lupakan. Work is normal.2 weeks. Siol arh da kene potong utk CPF. Eh, dat means aku da jadi kakak2 ada CPF egh.. wahahahaha..And being back with the kids last Friday was a good therapy. I heart them! Tapi Stuart Little tkde arhh.. And Nira....

They're picking up bit by bit. I really do hope, these upcoming events can bond evrybody like before. PENTAS, shows and Khatu. I do feel something is lacking. But I don't know... Anyways, its refreshing to see 3 rows again. And I do hope these would appreciate they have more shows despite the tight school schedule. Taklah macam zaman aku dulu.

Last arh pantun sebelum berambos.

Petikan dari Takleh Angkat Beb! Kisah Hang Toy dan Hang Joni:

Nasi lemak buah bidara

Sayang selasih hamba lurutkan

Buang emak buang saudara

....Bodohkan?

Sambungan untuk pantun tersebut:

Nasi lemak buah bidara

Sayang selasih hamba lurutkan

Buang emak buang saudara

Memang patot saudara dibuang kan?

ahhh ni last.. ni random giler. Pantun dapat dari pantry:

Nasi lemak buah bidara

Sayang selasih hamba lurutkan

Buang emak buang adik-beradik

Makcik yang dikeji, amek balik.

jawab..jawab...

I just wanna go to sleep smiling, so when I die in my sleep, I'd die smiling.

A note

2007-06-18T14:49:00.000+08:00

Hi guys! Sorry, haven't been updating my blog a very long time. Besides not having much time, cuz i've been doing other things and uploading photos @ Multiply, I haven't been racking my brains for my new blog layout. So, I was planning to change everything you see here. The outlook doesnt give me anymore inspiration to blog. Hahaha. Kentals.

I try to relink you guys/girls when i'm done doing my new layout. Tapi aku sungguh malas. Ok bye!

If it's not working, go send them for repairs.

2007-05-05T17:46:00.000+08:00

May, is not a good month for those in love. I suppose.

Ouh, btw, a blog is subjective to a person. Not many has exciting stories to tell. Mostly, a journal where they can pour out their thought, cuz no1 listens much to them. Even if its merepek, and no1 reads, at least they'd feel better cuz they've pour their hearts out.

So, what's up with the opposite sex? No pun intended there, ya noe. WHat makes a couple? One cranky female, and one egoistic male. Cuz when the girls stirs sumthing up, it's cranky. How bout them? They're just being egoistic. Cuz, here's the fact, guys like being dominant. Not that girls can be dominant...

Its true that true love never does run smooth. But why is it that way? Is it so hard for them to talk things out? I've been keeping too much, I realise....

It doesnt take a genius to see through a girls' emotions.You know her emotions, but what you don't know is how to tackle the emotions. Like how I don't know how to express my gratitude or ragrets. So... listen to the song "Hard To Say I'm Sorry".

I wanna be Cicher Ayinn.

2007-04-30T15:40:00.000+08:00

Chatting n bitching with Kharin has been therapeutic. I feel ya, bitch. Anyways, the thought of me teaching sounds good uh. Remember what Fid n Fahmie once said, when times are good for me, I'll be a teacher.Maybe what they foresee is somewhat true. Teaching doesnt sound that bad afterall. No, the thought of getting paid while studying is good..

Follow our conV.

bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
ko kat nus kan?
Khairin says:
tk ah, kat nie
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
ouh
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
cikgu ape?
Khairin says:
cikgu bedah
Khairin says:
ahakzz..
Khairin says:
cikgu myu
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
arh
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
ur career is somewhat secure
Khairin says:
ok ok ah...
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
aku nk join nie, tapi pey jauh..
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
ader bond kan?
Khairin says:
ade..
Khairin says:
kau blaj 2 thn n bond is 3 thn
Khairin says:
bulan2 kau dpt duit gaji
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
ouh
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
not bad..
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
but how r the fees?
Khairin says:
$0
Khairin says:
sema govt bayar
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
serious?
Khairin says:
yup yup..
Khairin says:
besh kan...
Khairin says:
free education n u get paid to sleep in class
Khairin says:
hahahaha
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
hahaha
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
takot stress arh
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
stress tk?
Khairin says:
slack giler....
Khairin says:
nk dkt exam aru stress ah..
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
yat pon kata jadi cikgu suah
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
dulu aku cite2 nk jadi arh
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
but i heard it was stressful
Khairin says:
hmm...stress mmg stress
Khairin says:
mana2 keje pun stress..
Khairin says:
duk umah, jaga anak ngan laki pun stress girl..
Khairin says:
tapi, time kat nie blaja ok ah..nkgi skul to mengajar tu yg maybe tough..
Khairin says:
budak2 skrg..ungkal naazubillah..
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
hahaha
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
jaga anak tk stress sgt. anak dgr kata
bLaCkr0sE ; c h o c o l a t e c i g a r says:
jaga laki yg susah
Khairin says:
yeah..

So yeahhh.. But there's one thing that bothers me. NIE is freaking far okay.. Unless I've got a liscence, I wouldnt mind going. Like the sound of Ain being a cicher? I do fine teaching is one fo the securest job, not to mention the most stressful one whcih u may end up going to IMH.

Maybe if I still hasn't got a job, I'd go for NIE, n b a chicer. Who knows what the world has in store for us, when times are good....

Whatever you say, that's what I think anyways.

2007-04-20T00:23:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, i wonder why or what makes me who i am? Amiable is not the word. I'm just friendly when I think I am.Still, i dun think that is a word to describe me. Which is why, people may think I am not the person whom they've heard about.

Ok, to cut it short, i'll put this as a self-reflection. People said, or think, I'm unsocial, or maybe, not as friendly..Ok, no pun intended. Admit it, guys, almost 70% of u think of it like that. That I'm an arrogant bitch. Far from it.

Sometimes, I do think I'm lagging somewhr amongst my own clique. Is it because I learn to socialise only when I turn errr..17? I mean really socialise, widen my circle of friends. Only when I got into poly.Cuz all the while, I'm only the stay-home girl, tight curfews, no CCAs.. No pun intended, again, but I admit I'm deprived of childhood. Is that the cause of Ain being paranoid most times?

I'm an Arian. And Arians are very conscious of what others think of them. Maybe, that's one of the many reasons why I don't speak much when others are discussing, or talking abt things I know little of? Cuz I know that when I open my mouth, nothing good comes out. I could pretend to be "macam paham" , DUH! Which never fails to make me regret my words. But when I talk, no one listens. Most times, I wish, I could join the conversation. Make myself present.
Well, what's the point of saying things, when you know nuts abt it, right? Orang kata, tu.... Kalau dah tak tau, jangan macam paham. But I wish I could you know, like give comments, say something..not make myself scarce. You'd say, it's just me.

Try being in a group maybe of three, or four, when the rest were so enthu talking about something, giving their macam paham comments, mcm bagus sgt padahal amateur jugak, and you're the only one trying hard to smile, wishing that you know what the fark r they talking about.. It's sad, believe me.

So how to be like them? Be macam paham like them? Smarang2 kasi komentar... But, hey,think of it on the bright side, you're just say the audience, or spectator, think of you as the end user, maybe someone who may buy the painting, or buy the record, someone buying apparels, and definitely someone who know nuts about those stuff...

The person buying the painting may not know if painting is good or not.Maybe the painting looks nice framed up on his/her wall.Maybe it's what they wanted.Then, person buying a record album. If we think the quality isn't good, the vocals not powderful, or the songs just suck, would the person know it? If he/she is say tone deaf, like me most times. Would he/she know the singer sumbang-sih here n there? A normal person could not notice slight differences.And there r many slight differences. Then a normal shopper. Buys t-shirts n accessories whatever that suit his/her likings. But there was problem. People often think his/her dressing is weird. Maybe colors dun match often, wrong concept..

Lookit guys, these people are normal people. But they have feelings too. They may not have talents or knowledge about stuffs, but they have their own taste too, no matter how weird or ugly it is. I feel them, cuz I maybe one of them. Misinterpreted paintings, or sketches...Awful design looks nice to me; ugly music and voices, dun matter much to me; whether my clothes have mismatch color n concept, I couldnt care less. To me, I call this individuality. If not, why in the world God make good n bad? Angel n devil? Beautiful (giler) n ugly?

Ouh, be a sport, Ain.Well, things take time.. And yes, there's something about me that you'd want to know.. I don't like to be plastic. But that's life..

"Let no one; not even friends nor family, influence the way you are. In life, we call that individuality"

Updates

2007-04-18T01:25:00.000+08:00

You peeps must have been bored to see no updates from me. Haha. Laku jugak khazanah hidup ku ini....Cuma senyap je tkde komentar, maklomla boring.

Let's start from errr....my 20th birthday. I'm 1/5 a century.right? OMG..how timeflies... At the strike of 12, i was eating my dinner cum supper. Bought from 7-11.Kesian la budak nie.. It doesnt matter cuz I was born @ 3.25am. Then i received a call from the boyfie.Cried. Den Caca Hamoe called just to sing me the bday song.Teared. The whole day trng n rehearsal. I had fun, i mean fun with the girls. We laughed at our own silly jokes, played "chop-chilli-chop", charade.. It was a hell lot of fun.Reminded me of those Pentas Wayang times, except we bonded among our own mostly.

It was touching, to hear people sing me a birthday song at the end of the debrief. Lyk Fid said, "pasal Ain tak penah celebrate birthday dier".. Correction, a surprise that was really a surprise.Of course I teared. When u're shagged, n got a surprise...even if its just a song, Ain is very gembeng at times.

The very next day was Pentas Janji. I didnt expect a kecoh event that started with laughter n happiness, turned into a cengeng scenes amongst us. This also marked my last day officially as an SGH. It feels awkward now that I'm handling these things related to the babes. Now I'm handling babies n todds instead.I dun wanna say much abt this, for it's been almost a month over.

The whole thing was purely entertainment.Storyline n such credits to the Artistic Director. I prove myself wrong, or rather others who thinks i cant dance. Ok, I STILL cant dance, but i'm contented that i managed 2 pluck that courage from within myself to dance. In front of 400+ audience.That's...something.Quite an achievement for me.. So what i'm labeled "gemok bersemangat"...

I hate speeches.You know, the pre-event n post-event speeches..Yeahh..Thank God it's done n over with.

Up next is my birthday pit. Attended my loved ones n close friends. It rained okay, but we had fun.In between it wasnt. Hehe...It was good to have a nice chat with a girlfriend, anyway.. We played Bingo. Did i win?? I think i did.Some 6 bucks..After that was payback time. Slept till late. Fuhhhh.Just what I needed. To hibernate.

Following week was Anugerah's audition, which i swear suck alot.From my very own point of view, 1) organiser shouldnt make JEC an audition location.It's unfair for those from the East, especially those who came for the 2nd day of 1stround audition. *budget kapperr* 2) its irrelevant, but i say it anyway..the way judges (n producers) pick them. Ouh well, it's suria anyway....

After that was spending almost a week @ TTSH visiting Pak Long who was admitted for high blood pressure n breathing difficulties.It was kinda bored, but the kids made my day, n times when we go kedai kawan..n layankan kazen confuse kiter.

Ouh, I forgot to mention that we went to catch Mr Bean n TMNT within a week.Awesome.

Ok, thatwas all it was about since my birthday.Boring la pulak. Havent had time in touch with the world. Been busy, n busy lately.

Ini pon nk tawooo.

The vibe n hype

2007-03-20T01:53:00.000+08:00

Coming very soon.. I'm feeling it, though not as much enthusiasm. But excitement is definitely buidling up. Well, if anybody's not recommending PENTAS:Janji, annual production by TP MAG, well, I do.

Sorry for no pictures, or posters. I don't fancy, and definitely don't recommend myself to put up a gents/ladies sign of the toilets. Don't judge a production by its poster, AT LEAST for this production. If you think 6 bucks is well worth to matao onky, think twice to indulge yourself into what i call "self-discovery of our innerself". And btw, 6 bucks (nor the poster itself) does not depict our almost 12-hour regime in school preparing for this.

Set in the 80's, in a college, involving 4 besties. Especially for those whose peak of teenage lives in the 80's, we'll bring you back (hopefully) into the disco era. To know the whole story, come down n watch PENTAS:Janji, Friday 23rd March 2007, TP Auditorium 1 Renaissance, 7pm.

For once, in Pentas, N2T, will not be a smoke-break session for u.

I just want to blog.

2007-03-16T00:03:00.000+08:00

I was stressed out yesterday, when I realised there's so many things to do, yet so little time for everything, which includes, time to study for test. I have 2 reasons 2 be happy this week.

ONE - I.. ehem.. passed my SIP. (lyk duh!!) It's just so nice to see a "GR" on the result SMS i received yesterday, though I've known the result much earlier that day. "GR" means graduate laaa.. Technically, yes.

Speaking of graduate, means work... Guess what? It's almost coming April, yet I havent receive my Jan & Feb pay. Lyk hallo!!!! I should be getting the pay cheque by this week...And been anticipating for the cheque siakk. Now this poor girl, no money already... Sueyy kapper aku ni.. Even if I get my pay, I still need to save for rainy days like now..Cause I haven't get any job as yet. pfft. BINGET hokayy. Maybe, if not for Pentas, I'd be staying at home, cuz ain't got a cent with me and i'll be almost grouchy for being such a useless pea brain idiot. Thanks to the fun n enjoyable trngs (both Tits & N2T), at least I can 4get my worry for awhile. Nevertheless, I still think of my pay whenever I got the time to sit or stare into space alone.

I need to buy a big bag, cuz my big favourable bags have all been worn out. But, I've got no moneyyy.Damn.....

Nvm that. NO wait! I do mind. It concerns my allowance okay. No, i am not complaining. Just whining.

TWO - Considering I was so stressed out yesterday,I should be happy today. cuz I realised I haven't been revising n test is today, I panicked giler babs punyer. I almost wanna breakdown. The feeling was so different from previous'. So I stayed up late till 3+ just to revise. Kalahkan exam biasa siak aku pey panic. bla..bla..bla.. Then I thought, 4 hours sleep would do me good. I swear my eyes became heavy the moment the bed looked at me invitingly.. I went to sleep bla bla bla... I woke up it's almost 9. 9, mind you. I didn't have time for my own revision. I rushed like mad, thank God I wasn't late for my e-trial. I was soooooooooooooo stressed out!! When came the test I was like "Omg..omg.." ntah berapa banyak kali selawat & Al-Fatihah. I was so careful not to hit the "end test" button as soon as I finished, so I could check all my answers again. Even when I clicked "end test" I did not look into the screen, instead I just clear my stuffs away..... And Alhamdulillah I passed. Phew........... Boy, was I beaming...............

But I'm still thinking about my pay cheque. How to catch Mr Bean on my bday like this??????? And Ninja Turtle.poofft.

Please...

2007-03-11T22:24:00.000+08:00

AKU TAKOT!

aku bingit dan geram
hari-hari semakin suram

pergi kalian yang memusnahkan
beriku ruang untuk berkasihan

mengapa cinta tak seindah mimpi
mengapa sering ada yang menyakitkan hati

mengapa berlagu tangisan kasih
mengapa luka masih tak pulih

kasih, hapuskan tangisan duka
kembalikan ceria, hati berbunga

-MawarHitam-

Was written because I am paranoid towards "hazards" coming our way. It's one after another. It's scaring me. Obviously, anybody can decipher. Tell me, they're not trying to separate us, right? We have our own ego... But I don't want sleepless, crying nights, with paranoia entertaining my thoughts.

We're turning 19th soon, and all i want is ur presence. Not present. I'll pray hard you'd change your mind abt it. There's no fun wihtout you. I know u'll be angry wif this entry. I am not seeking sympathy from you.

I love you the way you are. Just that way. It's perfect for me. And I don't wanna lose you cuz you're my one n only love.

It's just mind boggling..

2007-03-07T22:54:00.000+08:00

I dunnoe how am I going to put it into words, but..let's just hope what I ever imagined will not come true. With hope that we'll hold on to us tightly..It's really scary, and I swear it's affecting my focus. I can just wander into space...visualising those..

Will things that happen in dramas happen in reality? There's possibilities everywhere.. What is all those are true? Well, looks like no1 knows me that much.. Well, someone does..or rather did. She knows I wont change partner that easily. Not any1 can get near me so easily.. If people say, I pick my friends, I could say that..If you're just some ..say..male species that tries 2 get near me, with high hopes of something much more...You'll be the first I'll strike off my friends list. Been there, done that. Ouh, boyfie, u dun have to get jealous. For more information, pls ask Sayang.I wonder where on earth is she right now..

There's something, of which I still despise up till now. There's a time when people think they can "matchmake" me with some guys. That happened years ago. Whether I am attached or not, dun ever think you could matchmake me with some people I barely know. If last time, you may say, or think, I pick based on looks. HALLOOO!!!! If I go for looks, my boyfie would be a model, or some rock star.. (rock star ader goodlooks ker?? Ouh ada.. Ryan Star is a rock star.) And now, it's obviously been proven that I don't go for looks, don't you dare pry into my privacy.

Simply said, I am attached.Very happily attached. So dun pry into my privacy, and dun even think you could win my heart. My heart's been stolen and well-kept by Yat. Even if anybody wanna say, "cikit2 yat, aku pey pasal la eh.tak susah kan orang pe." Tak paham arh org2 ni..Bile dulu single-mingle sibokkan aku takde matair..Ni da hopefully happily ever after, korang bising lagi..

This is what I hate: Guys who think they are good enough to win any girls' heart. Worst, those who think could win the parents' hearts first. In this era, matchmaking is only for nerdies. Kau hensem mana pon, kalau tak segorgeous Wentworth Miller dan Channing Tatum n most importantly, se-goobygoober Yat, i won't turn twice. In terms of Jaja, only 3 factors - abit fat, hairy n curly. I'll settle wif fat and hairy. I'm good.

Apa kata, friendster ni kan besar..Some say it's full of what they'd call minahs n mats, well, there's also Multiply, My Space, Tagged bla bla bla...You can find your partners out there.

Even if I have no1 2 marry me one day, I don't need anyone to matchmake me. So, buzz off.

I wanna marry my gooby-goober, n i love u loads.

I just wanna blog...

2007-03-03T20:38:00.000+08:00

And..I'm trying to find a better way to phrase sentences.. I think i've blogged about this before. About talking at the right time, right places or so... I've always been unlucky to have said the wrong things, at the wrong time, or not doing the right things at the right time.

For now, I prefer to keep shut, talking too much may offend anyone out there. And, in case I didn't talk, doesn't mean I'm "sombong" okayy. Once you've really know me, you know I am not. I dare not be overly friendly.Serik beb!I haven't been talking much to friends either. I prefer keeping myself shut. I've had enough speaking at the wrong time, or hitting the wrong target, worst, asking the wrong questions.

Okay. Saya da fenings. Saya ni pemalu.Kalau awak nak kawan ngan saya, bobal la ngan saya.Saya tak sombong..

LAINI PENGUIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! APE PRESENT AKU TU????!!!

I love surprises, yet I hate it at times..ButI adore presents.

Video

2007-02-28T23:23:00.000+08:00

Take a look lahh..

The Aftermath

2007-02-28T16:19:00.000+08:00

Well, the wedding's over... Just the mess and more mess.. Alhamdulillah, things went smoothly, albeit the gliches and ppl wanting to spoil the majlis. And thanks to ppl, especially those who meant to jeer with hope we'd "melatah" by the word "grand", i'll take it as compliments. Biasalah... Orang senang cikit mana ada orang suker.

My specially big thanks, to RedHerring for the nice rose, henna-ed on my hand. Ouh so gorgeous..Pals, take a look on her blog, or multiply on her portfolio. (Ok, da promo..kak, 25% hehe) I'll have roses henna-ed on my whole body when i get married.Hurhur..

The whole anticipation n the event itself was torturous!! Adik pengantin kene buat extra2 kerje..Tiring okayy.. Da pakai lawa2 kene downgrade cuci pinggan mangkok on Saturday. Dah kenape egh.. Mana ada yang tak senang duduk nak provoke2. Some people...old oredi still want to provoke2.. Mana ada orang tanya soalan pelik2..Orang dah takde buat ape dikenang..

Thanks to the lovelies that came down. For those who came, but I wasn't around to entertain, I'm sorry. Was so busy... And almost agitated when I've got to run errands at one time altogether.

She made me smile. My new found love, Cica.

Let's pray for Achik to get married quick. Afterwhich, hopefully it's my turn.. Hahaha mentelx. All girls' dream is to have her dream wedding being realised. So, now, it's time to open a wedding planner for myself..

Condolences

2007-02-22T18:51:00.000+08:00

An uncle of mine has just passed on yesterday. Such coincidence. Kita hanya merancang, tapi Tuhan menentukan. May Allah bless his soul. Semoga dicucuri Rahmat ke atas rohnya. Al-Fateha. Amin.

A few more days for Sissy's big day. Along the way, there are bound to be mishaps. I'll be very busy as of today. (Padahal bgn 2+; mampos mak aku pekik) Ouh well, adik pengantin.. Sis's wedding kite yg sibok sampai da tak keje... (sounds familiar anyone?)

After Sunday, I'll be posting up more pix of the wedding. All I want for the wedding is a a smooth eventand pray hard nopthing bad will happen. AND IF ANYONE DARE TO MAKE TROUBLE OR MESS AROUND WITH ANYONE OF MY LOVED ONES, WATCH OUT. Ada yang berani datang buat kacau atau ada yang berani nak tunjuk muka, jangan sampai mak aku naik berang.

INGAT, sumpahan seorang ibu adalah yang terdahsyat.

Be my Valentine, please.

2007-02-14T01:21:00.000+08:00

This made me smile.

Jaja: Ko imagine, egh...Kite takde valentine, jadi kite valentine each other..Skalik tgh jln2.. aku ckp..."Eh Ain, tgk tu..." (pointing 2 something)

Ain: Ape...?

Jaja: Kau ckp Yat bz kan... Beh tadi ko ckp dier peberet gilerrr kat Shahril Ishak, kan???

Ain: (burst out laughing) Kiter nmpk Yat & Shahril valentine each other!!!!

Laini: Hahahahahahahaha

Ain: And u noe whr I picture it? @ Parkway! Hhahahaha

Laini: Aku ponn!!!

Can I have red & white roses?? Cuz, they say I'm crazy 2 ask 4 black rose. But if anybody's able to give me even 1 black rose, I'd be happy. Contented enough. Ouh God, take pity on this girl, for she haven't got any flowers in her life before..

And finally, after 13 days of rindu-rindu, I got 2 meet the boyfie. Hmmmm...so.... would you be my Valentine??

2007-02-12T01:37:00.000+08:00

I can't believe I cried upon reading all my pass entries in my journal.No, certain parts. Maybe I just missed him.

Of roses and diamonds, affirmation.

My Sunday rants

2007-02-11T15:41:00.000+08:00

I'm bored. Anyways, I'm doing my report. My last ever report. Taking a break from it. I had wanted to go out the boyfie, apparently, he's gotta do school work. Speaking of which, it's been a good/bad 11 days I've not seen him. I missed him though. When ppl say, distance makes the heart grow fonder, I just don't trust them.

So here I am, a short countless breaks from my report writing.I have to finish it asap so I can proceed with other things that demand my attention.I've not been reading the blue book. Pooft. ARGH! It's crazy not going out. And it's sunday, btw.

Highlight of the week is that, I finished my SIP. I survived CAAS. Duh! Gonna miss everything there.All, except the office in T1.

Another highlight was, I went to Shahril Jantan's wedding yesterday. And mind you guys, a very stern warning ahead: Dun ever hold your wedding @ a town park or anywhere that don't provide convenient carpark. It suck. I swear. What was supposed to be a grand wedding, turn out (to me), to be a quiet one..Maybe I came when it just started, but I managed to catch the time when the groom comes. Looking @ the kompang troupe, I wasn't mesmerized, but it made me smile. Sebenarnye aku tak paham mengapa begitu. I've never heard that kinda paluan, so, was intrigued by it. And best of all was, the kompang guys menari la siak! Not menari lyk menari.Just a small performance before they proceed to sing.

Now it reminded me of my peeps there @ Taman Warisan right now.Rangsang Rias Pusaka Bangsa IV. Was supposed to perform, but due to work commitment, there goes another good opportunity.I missed them so.

And while other be looking forward to Valentine's outing (ouh roses!!), I was thinking of what happened it what Jaja, Laini n myself's imagination came true.Cibeh siak. So, anyways, for those who haven't heard of the song Papa Jahat (bukan video egh), listen up here.Sung by Fabulous Cats...Cat Farish.. and there's Adeep too. That name doesn't ring your bells?

Nk leak something bole??

2007-02-08T00:42:00.000+08:00

A big HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY to my tenuk friend (above)!!! Aku tau rare sungguh nampak Achiok naik bus. Heh. Have a good birthday with the other half, ya. Mcm gatal rasenyer mulut ni nk me-leak-kan sesuatu.

May this year be a bliss to you,friend. May God bless you and your love ones, cuz you've been a good friend throughout the good n bad times. *sheep smiling* Walaupon kau tenuk, kao tetap kawan aku.

Dah tu jer. This makes my day.Cuz awwww it's so swee.... Hmmmph..

Can I have one too?? And a rose too??

This was what I learnt yesterday.

2007-02-07T22:56:00.000+08:00

It all came about when... Sai spotted it.. Don't you realise that almost everything that ends with the letters -EK sounds wrong, or have a wrong meaning??? Go figure that out. It makes sense. Kalau ader Didi, even the word NEN-EK now sounds wrong.

Anyways, da dgr lagu Papa Jahat? Chuber lah dengar. I heard over @ HOT FM, and I was with Dad in the car that time. It's lagu egh, not video. Tak pons, t jumpe ku dgrkan.

Someponderingthoughts.

2007-02-06T09:38:00.000+08:00

"Your most-ardent- enemy is your evil self which resides within your body" - Hadith Bukhari.

I was right when I say none of us gets away from hypocracy.

Nevertheless, it's high time to rectify these matters again. Sounds familiar, huh? At every mention of the word "rectify" there goes the problem again.And again. And again. In fact, I dunnoe what I'm getting at.

And hypocracy, a word too big. But all of us are in it, though.

So! Come make merry, everybody. When the saying goes, when you can't beat them, you join them, there's truth in those lines. Huhu. It's tough, and we're still trying. We all love to play pretend..play acting..

How I wish my childhood was better, cuz I wish I had better talents at something else. I only have one regret, I wished I hadn't made that move, now that it cost me my regrets. Awaiting that time, to proceed and leave everything behind. Maybe find myself a new talent. Who knows?

My only hope is to get and secure myself with a job. That is what I'm looking forward to. And to the time I will handover...

Right now, I wanna lay-low and soul-search. Maybe I'll find the right friends, maybe I'll be the perfect loner i used to be.

Will everything end soon?

2007-02-05T11:09:00.000+08:00

The weekend has been okay. Managed to complete the QC on berkats of 3000 in a day.So good. So the plan to go out yesterday has been cancelled too. *boo-hoo*

Now today.At work, but not doing any yet. Suppy's on child MC which makes that our ultimate free day. Hmm... prolly I'll go check out the fans anticipating for LION's return later in the afternoon.. Other than that, I wish I was at home, sleeping or something.

And my hope for everything that has been concurrently active and in progress to just come to a halt.Or, end soon. I can't wait to embark on a new phase in life, of which will be good.

It will be nice to get a surprise.maybe a visit, or anything. That is something I cant anticipate. Or maybe roses.. Awww..I love roses.

Anyway, something random. Do I look like Seha???It's a no-no siak.

It's not a good thing when you have period and is sick at the same time.

Babe,will you fetch me again?

I love my job, it's the work that i hate.

2007-02-01T11:54:00.000+08:00

I'm thinking of something to talk about.

Okay. It's time to proceed to next phase. I maybe talking in circles, but you know, hush-hush. So... next phase.So far so good...Just hope to achieve my target.It was all joy after 15 minutes of anxiety.Ok, that's all for it.I've a long way to go.

It's hard arh, trying to best to keep things to yourself, when you know this is your blog and you need to take things off your mind and chest.Urgh. So, i supposed, blogs are best kept or updated for memorable and happy events in your life. Cuz, when you try to let it out virtually, no one listens to your tone.And they sparks errr... tonnes of nonsense. That's the very best rubbish I can get to say. So, when you have things to say, say it in your own personal diary where you will never be sure if there is anybody to read them up when you die or when they find your diary some 20-30 years later in a pile of junk. Lesson learnt. (and forgotten)

Next up... Lions won 1st leg of the finals. Hmm... Is it pure luck? They're not the Lions I used to support a decade ago.Those times of Fandi Ahmad, Malek Awab, David Lim, Lim Tong Hai, Jang Jung who looks like dad.. But one thing for sure.. the boyfie like Shahril Ishak so much. Sounds gay. Anyway, all the best Lions for the 2nd leg. You know, it doens't matter much they win or lose. My life continues as usual.Nothing changes.Not like if Lions got the title, Singapore gets a public holiday. So, i supposed tmr Aiport will be packed with Lions fans n fanatics.No, fanatics only. I think. They're flying off to Bangkok, the 1040 flight on SQ62. If i'm right, that is. {Reminiscing those times. Kental siak dulu kakak-ku ada feeling2 nk jodohkan aku ngan anak Barry Whitbread.. Hahhahahah. Makan bread je lah aku hari2..}

I don't wanna count down to SIP ends. Cuz that means I need to look 4 a job. And that sucks okay. What if the jobs all don't want me again? This place wants me...if they want; and if I can go back Avsec, yea... I'd love to. I met so many kinds of ppl.. The officer who made a remark of we ppl cutting queue when she can go and check our passes instead of standing there like some small titty model, the weird mentally-ill person who asked me on the skytrain if i'm a duty terminal officer of which i wasnt even wearing thier uni,then kwn ku seekor ni yg suker nah bontot ape aku buat, mane aku pegi dan tkde sense of direction langsung dan dier jugak shave bulu tangan dier!!! lelaki siak!!! And this one Coffee Bean staff whose face resembles Aliff, but with a Dumb & Dumber's hairstyle. Name naz siak.

Asal egh, org kata mat2 keje airport hensem2???My biggest question mark, cuz, I never see any hensem berger ard. Or maybe my taste is just too high for them to even make a pass.Heh.

I hope to have an enjoyable weekend.

After so long...

2007-01-30T11:37:00.000+08:00

After only a few girls turned up for a pathetic meeting, we headed to Al-Qader. Ok, so there's Fid, Jaja & myself. Konon nk discuss set. Ok,we did. But something captured my attention. It's been there for so long.. And i have been wondering about it for so long.. I wondered, what is in the building.. I see people come and go, if it's an office, wah.. the employer must be damn lucky to have employees going back at late hours...The building laid stagnant. No lights or whatsoever. Just the buildings, and there's even a carpark. It couldn't be some welfare association, could it?

Here I am, to present my findings about SSA (aka Singapore SOKA Association) . Call me lembab or dumb, doesn't matter. Now I know what SOKA does. Depicted from its website, SOKA is a Buddhist organisation established to promote understanding and practice of Buddhism. SSA was officially registered in 1972 with the Registry of Societies.

"Nichiren Buddhist philosophy teaches that every individual has the potential to become enlightened in his or her lifetime. Each person has within, the power to overcome life's challenges, to live a life of value and be a positive influence in one's community, society and the world. Nichiren Buddhism is derived from the Lotus Sutra, the epitome teaching of Shakyamuni Buddha that affirms the universal Buddha nature in all people. " .. ouh kisahnyer....

And, soka in Chinese means value creation. How cool. Kire, kalau Muslim ada MUIS, buddhist ada SOKA. Eh, Fid, Jaja!!! Aku dah tau ape dorang buat arh.. Tapi aku masih tak tau ape kat dalam. Mau check it out pe?? Tapi aku condiferrent, ade wak buddha tuh. Ape egh name dier? Ntah arh.. AKu mane geng dier..Aku ajak lari2, dier asek nk duduk jer..

Eh, tak sangka egh, dalam diamnya building tu, dia ader kene-mengena ngan Singapore INternational Foundation, Ministry of Community Devt Youth & Sports, National Youth Council.. Bagui arh dorang ni.. Patotla salu balik lmbt jer...

Alas, I learnt something new about other religion.

Today is the big day. Pray for me, okay?

Blastin'

2007-01-29T17:50:00.000+08:00

It was a more than fine weekend afterall. Ok, I've got less than 10 mins to kill before knockoff time. Was busy the whole day compiling some data. Bongok la anak saper yg buat survey tak compile into 1 spreadsheet. Anyways, had wanted to fast since today's 10 Muharam, Hari Asyurah, but some miscommunication caused me to forgo the fast. Hmmph. Sokay.

Aiman ganggu aku!! Just to tell me, lela n yat that he misses us. What the Aiman he is..Okay. Itu jekkk.

Short story.

2007-01-24T12:25:00.000+08:00

Stinky mouths. *Caris, I missed you idiot! Cuz of the word stinks* Okay period. That's random.

Try imagine yourself cooking up some marvellously special dish for a special occasion, only to be spoilt by access salt or something, and your precious dish is gone to waste. That is exactly how it has been. And there's two options left; to cook a new dish n try something different or let it go down the drain. Your effort, i mean. Comtemplation is heart pain okay. I know.

Then suddenly you thought, "Since I've been trying to cook some special dish, but it never turn out good, why don't I let everything go down the drain.Maybe the method is not right... Maybe I've to study a better recipe that will not be spoilt, or maybe the utensils used??? Ouh no, shouldn't be what... Must be the ingredients! Yes, the ingredients!! Ingredients plus accidents is what make the whole dish bad.." You thought so hard, till you almost forgot your mother.

Since the occasion doesn't come everyday, yet it's special, you thought it may be good to have sometime and research on that dish. If a chef can give all his patience in making a SIGNATURE DISH, you should feel the same about what you're doing. Being an amateur, you decided to take things as they come, loosen up and back to be doing what you're comfortable with.As long as your dish will slowly be a goodand special dish, you'll whip it out on the special occasion.

However, you felt that you should go. Suddenly you felt like you can't handle accidents. And obviously you wouldnt want your kitchen to blow up, just for one special dish. Suddenly your patience is wearing thin. Neighbours.. ahhh they're the closest around you, and they can either be good neighbours or a pain in the ass.So they're the latter that kept complaining of the burnt smell from your unit. You wondered, "don't they also have their own special dish that they have been trying to create?? Can't they just leave me n my dish alone?? Ouh God, stop them from poking into my kitchen. I'm just a small fry here in the neighbourhood.An amateur. Go and sniff elsewhere!!"

There you were..in your small kitchen with all your pots and pans, kitchen utensils and ingredients all over the place. You were slumped in one corner. You've had enough that you broke down. Nothing seems to be right. You've been told off cuz neighbours never stop complaining about the burnt smell. While thinking of all possibilities to move on and stop thinking about SIGNATURE DISH, you fell asleep...

So yuh.. No more ideas to continue...Maybe you guys can help. I have an idea of a someone who appears in her dreams, to encourage her not to give up on her hard work, or to tell her that having signature dish isn't important at all.Or maybe it is the someone for that special occasion whom she had wanted to prepare the dish for that appear in her dreams, to tell her she need not worry about the dish, for that does not matter. And he'll accept her for her. But wait, this ain't no Cinderella story or some fairytale.. There can never be a "And so they live happily ever after.."

Since the day has yet to end, I shall tell myself this is yet to be the best or worst anni ever.

SO LONG, SMALL FRIENDS!

Silly random stuffs.

2007-01-19T11:32:00.000+08:00

Maybe I should just stick to weekly updates on this blog. Reasons being, my lappy was down with freaking virus.Though now it's okay after rebooting for the 2nd time, my bluetooth is still not available. Anybody got any idea why?????????? It's in the system, but it just wont come out, you see. and my hp is laden with all the photos i've been taking since last week. And it's not okay. Cuz, I dun intend to use mt USB cable for my hp. It doesnt seem to be working. And bsides, since day 1 i've been using bluetooth for connection from hp to lappy.

We've had our performance for the openhouse. I hope, who's there were entertained by us. Should I say our new antics? And if I say, everybody wld start asking for it; I recorded the performance. However, I dun have any USB cable to connect the camcorder to my lappy, so I can post it somehwr...Sorry pals, wait till I get a USB cable for that soon. I missed the post-show lepaking session to brood over our mistakes done during performance.As, I had to rush back to office to help out with the National Security Course. (free mkn lagik).

Speakin gof free makan, I had a sumptious lunch on Tuesday. Free mahh.. Since CAAS held AAR (Annual Airport Reception), myself and Kak Marlina, my supervisor started inappropriately with Chocolate Fondue and end our meal with it again. The tempura was good, but Tiger prawns were rationed.Satay was marvellous too. Not to forget the Cream of mushroom and DIY garlic breads.

Sidetracked. Back to yesterday, I went home early.So, I took my time to think of what to wear today.No matter how late i reach home, I'll nvr fail to search through my wardrobe for clothes to wear.Apparently, I wore the wrong heels to work. Now my soles feel like they've got abrasions. I watched AI 6 and Prison Break. Duh. AI was....I dunnoe what to call it,but somehow I sympathize with some participants.They're like making a fool out of themselves. Kesian kan.. And there are those like from twilight zone. I felt like watching those weird movies like LOTR and movies alike with weird characters. Yet I laughed still.

I want my bluetooth BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, so work is boring nowadays. I've been thinking, shld I apply here. I like the job, just that the work gets on my nerves at times. And, can I stay @ AVSEC?? I love the environment. So secluded..Recently I've received a phonecall from this particular company.I think I wanna trun down the interview. Not that I'm picky abt work. Upon hearing I can choose between full time nd part time and there's alot of psot to choose from, I was keen. But I decided to fore go it. Maybe better work will come again soon. My whole reason is that, the caller is sooooo chikopek. And I cant stand that. Furthermore, he's a Malay. That's it. NO.

Eh, guys.. I GOT MY BLUETOOTH BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was clever enough to check into HP's site and finally!!! So, here's a bit of my previous outing to El-Sheik den back home.

Achiok taking public transport is soooooo rare. So here goes. Mumble without Gloria.

A bus full of makels.

With this, I'm very happy. Can go lunch oso happy. Wait till 5.30pm, then go back..

Mommy, when will money drop from the sky?

My Green Day.

2007-01-13T23:23:00.000+08:00

I cant help posting this. Cuz it's been twice we've been hit by the twin bug. First was wehn we both went to NLB, wearing black tops n tuds and jeans and birks/neckers and black bag.. so cute. Sumpah org tgk kiter okay. And sumpah kiter tk plan langsong okayyyyyy.

Beh kali ni green day. Bacin kan.. We met up after sucha long time together.. And again we wore similar outfits. Hirok-pikok egh org tgk kiter. Confirm dorang pk kiter plan.

One nice shot on some staircase, cuz we need light.Cekik darah kan..

There's one time when we were chatting and eating Sapporo popoks & bubble teas, a chemong jumped to a dry-riser and jumped to where Laini was sitting. Then later on the same thing happened, only to play alipong with me. So cute...

Tanx, girlfriend. For the companion. It's been quite awhile. And I too missed the old bunch's picnic. Lepas Pentas arh?? Hee... *hint hint*

I hope to dream of you sleeping like a child, like previous times... i heart u.

Parfum..

2007-01-11T16:49:00.000+08:00

Hey, who's planning to buy GUESS Gold perfume?? If anybody is, pls holler me. Cuz, we'd get cheaper price, if we buy 2, you see.. Prolly you'll pay just $70.. (It's 75, airport price).. It smells like Lollita Lempicka..

Or, anybody wld like a share of CK Green Apple? It's a set of 2 30ml bottles, for $69.90 only. Imagine, you'd only pay abt $35 jerrr.. Wowness...

Maybe I could forgo my Adidas Original, if anybody wld like to buy the GUESS Gold, or CK Green Apple.... Quick, before time runs out. Tenkiu.

Ouh, and my lappy's infected with virus. So, here I am, updating @ work.. I need my lappy now for work, if I shift to T1. And, I so don't like the office environment. Ouh, lappy, get well soon yahh.. If T1's gonna be a shitty environment, I'll look forward to carrying goods, for the orientation and to the end of SIP.. 4 more weeks.

2007-01-09T00:06:00.000+08:00

This guy, is a Cancerian.

Your True Love Is a Cancer

Why you'll love a Cancer:

Cancer's loyal and sincere heart makes your own sensitive heart melt.
Caring and devoted, a Cancer will take the lead in pursuing you - and not give up!

Why a Cancer will love you:

You're laid back enough to deal with Cancer's little mood swings and freak-outs.
A fellow homebody, you know how make Cancer comfortable and at home with you.

What Sign Is Your True Love?

I sleep smiling tonight.

JB outing on eve of Hari Raya Haji

2006-12-30T23:40:00.000+08:00

WHat is the very best thing to do on Hari Raya Haji Eve? Well, to begin with, I don't sense any holidays coming.I don't feel Hari Raya Haji, nor New Year. I think of them as just another public holidays.

So, today we had planned to go Kg Jawa to buy some cloths. Maklom la egh, kakak kawin, adik pengantin kene glamour.. Jammarahhh.However we diverted our way to JB and got some nice cloths for the intended bajus. Ouh wait! Before the whole thing, we had breakfast @ Sarah Rose. And this small girl, despite the fact that I have yet to poo for quite a few days, decided to eat my long awaited Butter Egg Thosai. Not 1 but two.

It's nice. Tapi macam pandang lagi kat dlm gmbr ni mcm kain langsir. haha Ropol2 macam Ramlah Ram!!

The whole trip was rather an unplanned one. After a thirst quencher stop, with my Carrot Susu, we shopped a bit @ UO and bought Hot Chocolate!!! Before we head down to Larkin, Achik and I bought Dunkin' Donuts. We were still eating despite the fact that we kinda full. Well, there are times when we hafta eat even if we're full. Like now.

After sending off our intended bajus for tailoring, and Achik's and Daddy's @ Sabree's, we had some light late lunch.. Or I must say early dinner? Achik and Daddy said light. Wait, do you call a Mee Rebus each, and Satays light meal?

And guess what? After buying some water containers @ Makro, we headed off to Perling Mall. i think intention was to look for some stuffs. I was busy looking for game shop that sells games for my PSP. Which has yet to be modified, cuz its 2.81. Darndest thing ever. And it so happened that Daddy and Uni were already seated @ Secret Recipe.So, both the bro and myself were kinda contemplating whether or not to ...you know..eat??So, telling ourselves that we may not be able to eat @ the same place back in Singapore, so we surrendered to a little feast, yet again. "Tak muat pon sumbat jekk..bile lagi nak dapat makan Secret Recipe kat Singapore.."

And the best thing in life happened, but I think I was too starstruck to even go up to him. Damn, we met Papa Rock la siakkk.. Ramli Sarip.. Like hello!!! Ramli Sarip okay... not Siti Nurhaliza...I swear he's cool shit okay.Legend siakk. Elated kaozzzz...

So that was how the boring day was spent.. As for now, it's Hari Raya Haji. So, Selamat Hari Raya Haji.. to those who's performed the pilgriimage. Don't ask me plans about New Year's eve.

Snapshots here.

Post-Khatulistiwa

2006-12-25T13:41:00.000+08:00

Where's the photos, girls??? Eniwei, here's the group pic taken off from DikirBarat.Com

We won that title, for the 2nd running time. Yes, Piala Kumpulan Wanita Terbaik. How do I feel? Satisfaction.But not fully satisfied. I'm thankful though. We could have done better, though. Guys and gals, whoever you ar, pst ker nira ker.. I was reading NIra's taggy, wen I teared reading those tags. Boy, was I touched.

Despite the title, there's still more improvement needs to be made. Lesson learnt for me, especially. Jangan tulis part2 da nak dekat dateline, no matter how hirok-pikok your head is, sampaikan hukum rima lari. *yak dish* Nevertheless, more trainings..Bleargh..

We knew the mistakes we've done on stage. And never did we had expected to win again. I really wanna know how we fair overall... Despite the fact that we were scapegoats, that the mic were only pulled nearer after us. Despite the fact, my lyrics was crap. We made do with everything. We cried over spilled milk.

I've thanked almost everybody that I've forgotten to thank this group of people, who came down especially to support us, NIra & PST. These people are, our President of MAG, Hajar, VP Hani, Secretary Nadiah, Treasurer Cipah, SNT girls - Dee, Sha & Ad, Laini and everybody else. Thank you.

Ok, so i'm going off to JB in 2 hours. Yet, I feel miserable. Damn. I should have gone out with the boyfie yesterday.Now he's miserable @ home. And I couldnt even do a single thing to make him feel better. Pooft.

Xmas List...

2006-12-21T11:43:00.000+08:00

Since Xmas is approaching, with the long weekends for most, I also wanna add more to my wishlist. This is what happen when you're attached @ SCA, with not many things to do.

Gucci Rush 2 - SGD88-110
Adidas Original -SGD66
Burberry Brit -SGD88-110
Bijoux Terner carry-all bag -SGD20
Levi's - SGD117-123
Giordano's Polo Tee - SGD23
Esprit's L/S top -SGD28-39
Casio Baby-G Sweet Poison Edition - SGD126
Casio Baby-G Gold Edition - SGD160
Guess imprint bangle watch -SGD154
Guess hobo bag -SGD171
PSP -SGD412 (AP so ex..)

I swear I can go kehrayzee over those. Buti'll be contented to be able to buy any one of the above mentioned perfume and watch and bag. Heeee... Mr Santa, pls come visit my blog.. My wishlist is up. Make sure I can get those... Pls Mr Santa... Wait. Who will be my Mr Santa? Ouh my... At these times, I wish I was a SPOILT BRAT.

See, being a spoilt brat, you'd get almost whatever you want. Mention, the next day, you'll get it. See how shiny their silver spoons are? On the contrary, you're obviously seen as a SPOILT BRAT. Born filthy rich, no need to work, while the rest slog day in and out.Get most luxury... And we're deprived of those..OUh my.. If only my pay is 1440 instead of a meagre 440, which almost used up cuz I bought working clothes. So, I supposed now left abt a quarter to survive the whole month. Of which, debts have yet to be cleared and dec bills have yet to be set aside. Pooft.

Pleaseeeeee Mr Santa...

2006-12-20T15:47:00.000+08:00

Reality check: 2 more trng days. Then, the big day. Filled with anxiety, rather than excitement.Loads of stress.Where things go wrong? I don't know. Risks are taken. So yeah. Hope it works. Every comp never fail to have setbacks for me. For us. Why is it so hard to get the team to be independent, responsible, less sensitive, respect..etc? Or maybe I'm the suey one. Every group I've been too (ok, there's only 2 so far), both are like actively inactive. Almost everytime come to trngs, there's only the same faces to entertain, and be entertained.So demoralising.

And I never stop looking for a brighter day. For me. And everybody else..Hmm.. Maybe I can find something useful to do the ext time I come for trng.Isntead of playing the waiting game, i could learn something new.Say...the ribena? Heee`

Who knows they can see my silly face playing those during Pentas next year? Ouh such high hopes. Anyway, anybody interested in this? (See pic below) Come and give your utmost support to TP dk girls, Nira Nyertika, and TP dk boys, Panjy Sry Temasek.

Hmmmm...should I post my lyrics here??... Nvm. Maybe some other time. Maybe after all's over... Maybe...

Ai shite ru.

Today I was....

2006-12-16T00:52:00.000+08:00

A mixed feeling person. Full of emotions. I had BIG lunch. Imagine.. triple decker, cheese cake and double chocolate. How sinful can I be???

Being with them, just feel perfectly like the old times..

All toilets shots. Not really.We took only @ skool toilet & TEKNO. yes, Tekno. Imagine that. Chuber egh, ader 4 orang sumbat dlm cubicle kat Tekno tuh. View more pix here.I miss those good times.

Get well soon, bie.

Reminisced, Hopes, and Whatnots random stuffs.

2006-12-15T12:50:00.000+08:00

A hell lot of things are running through my head.Causing me ~~sleepless~~ restless nights. Is it just me, or is it my luck? It is simply tough. Tough, not being me, but in the position that I am. Tell me, who am I supposed to confide in? Worst of all, it's getting tougher especially when things are coming to the end. For me.

I'm waiting for March. Alot of things happening.. My birthday. I'm turning 20. *gulps* What difference does that make? A year older, a year dumber. And a hell of alot more to think.. Such as.. "When am I getting married???", "When am I getting my Degree???", "When to stop depending on parentsssss?" (Wait, I didn't get anymore pocket money or allowances, whatever you call it, so that means I'm "so-called" independent kan?)..then.."When to earn more money..?" Duh, I've got to save up for dry spells, SOS, marriage (again. Why is it popping in my head, for goodness sake?!), DEGREE, driving liscense, car, bike, loads of shopping spree and eating frenzy...???? Provide better lives for my aging parentsssss.. (You see, I've got 2 sets of parents.Ni blom include parents in laws tau..) WHEN IS THAT ALL GOING TO HAPPEN???

Other than being OLD, I'm looking forward to Pentas. And hope to make it a blast. Like that of Pentas Wayang. My 1st on-stage production in TP. I love those moments. Those memories live long in my heart, I tell ya. Tak kisahlah asek kene kacau jek egh..But when we reminisce, I think it's the best Pentas ever. Even if this acad year's gonna be the same,the feeling is somehow different.. Yeah...nothing could ever be better than the first. (Macam first love, first failure, first kiss, first errrr whatever la..)

I think it's high time I search within myself. Soul-search la dumb. And it's high time to get away from being the 4Ls. That is, lemah,lembek,lembut,lembab.What do people call that? Your mutual rights? Or your social rights? Whatever. But my main concern is, what if, I am gonna hurt anybody during that process/procedure? I HATE WHAT IFs!!

*Bisik naluri* Where's the democracy, Ain?? You wanna be fair, cuz you dun want anybody to get hurt, to feel pressurized, to apape lagik la...In shorter terms, you don't want people to be like Ain.The old Ain. The Ain who only listen to others, without others listening to her.To only suffer in silence.

*Bisik syaitan* Ain, it's time you stand up for your rights.Maybe for others too.Listen, someone, or some people have to get hurt.Either someone gets hurts.Stop thinking of others, Ain. At times, for the benefit of all, you have to call the shots. Not for long, lass. There's very short time left for you.Leave an impact on them all, whether it's hatred, or admiration. When will you ever stop pleasing people, and here you are, feeling all gullible??Forget all the ties.No one will respect you, if you always give in. "Datang sarat gendongan ini, berat pundak makin beban.."

BLERGH. March, come sooner please. I can't wait to pass on. Then i'll be care-free...I'll be happy..I can live normally.I hope. Can I be reborn and make up for all the mistakes I've done? I don't regret all my decisions. Even if I made the wrong moves, there's always lesson to be learnt in my journey. Only certain things I regret. And I mean it.

Emosi egh? Do I look like a dictator? I should be looking like one, you know. *rolled eyes*

Let's end it off. I've been late for work since last week.. Not really late. See, I reach work @ 8.50 by my watch, but the clock in the office states it's 9.00am. It's 10 minutes faster. Ntah negara mana ntah dier ikot.

Her's some random stuff I've found in our office... "The organization is like a tree full of monkeys, all on different limbs at different levels, some climbing up. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes." Make sense? True.

I'm off to lunch!!

Bahasa menunjukkan bangsa kita yang suka nah berbahasa.

2006-12-13T09:37:00.000+08:00

Errr.. ni random. Sebenarnya, ku nak berblog dalam bahasa melayu. Ntah dah knape, tapi macam feeling2 nak berbahasa melayu pulak.

Bukan apa.. Masalahnya ni.. tak berat.Ok, ku da tak tau nak ckp macam mana lagi ntah, but someone is getting on my nerves!!!!!!!!!! Berbalik pada bahasa ibunda.

Ku rasa, kanak2 MWC ni memang gini arh. The male species especially. Err.. Yang lelaki lahh. Seb baik boyfie ku da bukan dari golongan mika2. Yang satu si rambot panjang mengurai tu dalah lembabon..tak bole kene sikit."Tak boleh kene sikit" tu maksodnye, tak bole kene panas, t matahari tu nak "bunuh" dia, angkat barang berat sikit dah mengeluh,..Chuber egh bayangkan.. ku yang pompan ni bole angkat kotak yang penuh dengan 12 folder, setiap satu dipenuhi dgn lebih 100 mukasurat. Imagine ku angkut 5 kotak macam tuh.

Dah tu, datang pulak lagi satu ni.Mula tu dia okay la. Tak lah se-irritating sekarang.Paling ku menyampah, bile ku cakap dier mcm nk feeling suara dier sek arh gitu. Bayangkan...

Ain: Eh, I think they not coming arh.
Dektu: Hmmmmm?

Stop it egh dier pey "hmmmm" tuh. Abe, ada lagi satu senario.Suke nah repeat ape ku cakap.

Ain: Shouldn't be la..Not today wat...
DektuLAGI: Not today uhhh?

Kalo korangs baca, mmg la tkde pape.. T jumpe ku, ku demo-kan.Betapa gelinye aku..Kalao dulu ada Cariss bole lah ku tahan.Ni aku sorangs ngan dorangs...Erghhhh.TIDAKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!

Behkan, tadik ku buat observation study arh.Yang sesungguhnye mendak.Egh, baru ku teringat, semalam ku nmpk 2 orang muke mirip Mudd.Yerp, the he-bimbo as the boyfie calls him.Same seyyy.Tapi dorangs pompans arh.Eh..satu shim. Kalau shim tu btol2 pompan confem lawa.Tapi budak ASO yg smlm ku nmpk btol serupa.And she's pretty I tell ya.Dia lagi qualify jadi air-stewardess ke pramugari ke highclass prostitute ke, highclass waitress ke, pape la yg korang panggil. She got the looks and she's cool type.

Berbalik pada cerita ku..Tadi gi buat study tuh ngan dua lahabau ni lahh..kita nmpk a group of pramugaris. (duh!) Kite pongs bobal arh pasal dorangs.Beginilah kisah kite.....

Saya: You see those girls...They look all the same to us right.
Dektu: Yalor..All the same.Same shape, same size, same hairstyle, same ass size, i guess.
Dekni: Really? Why?? (harap maklom dekni lembab nk mampos)
Dektu: Can't you see that?? They all look the same.
Saya: I think all who wants to work in that kinda line must have pretty face to die for, that 36-26-36 figure...
Dekni: You sure.. (Kan dier percaya ckp aku...)
Dektu: See the ass laa.
Saya: Eh wait! Not all are the same you know.See... some not chio at all for goodness sake! Eh, got one there you see....
Dekni & Dektu: (tgk satu arah..)
Saya:I swear she got fats underneath those supertight fitting 2 piece.

I got a foul mouth today.I know. Bukan selalu dapat observe benda2 pelik ni.Alahh ni passing remark jek.Confem pelik kalau ader orang seperti yg diatas yg nk baca bende karut ni kan?

Anyway, ku da dapat pay cheque!! Harap maklom egh, ni 1st pay.Selepas 2 bulan.. Tapi part touching nyer... Beg Carlo Rino yg ku kepinginkan dah tkde on display!!!!!!!!Yup bingit. Beh kan, ada jam lovers' collection Baby G & G Shock yg putih!!!!!!!Bingit sungguh.Hmmmph...

Ahhh lagi satu, kawan2..Ada wisdom tooth ngan tumbuh ni ha kat gusi ku.. Yela.. tumbuh kat gusi la mana lagik egh..

Would you be free on 23rd onwards for me????

The weekend's not blastin' yet.

2006-12-11T20:58:00.000+08:00

Anyway, C087 had our finale dinner @ Riverside Indonesian Restaurant. A smaller rival to Bali Thai. I still love Bali Thai. We played hide n seek with the Restaurant. Hmmph. Usual. After hide & seek, we played the ever so famous the waiting game! I think we only started eating @ 8pm. Chit chat with our ex-lecturers, Ms Rohaya & Ms Rashidah.

Here's the snaps. Courtesy of Sha.

The remenants of c087.

The ladies..

The look on my & Kay's face.. revealing something..Shhh..

Then we (the girls above, except Ms Marlina), headed to City Hall MRT. Upon reaching, Sha (yes, Sha) suggested we walk to Bugis MRT instead. Bacin! Being us, the lazy bones, sape nak kan!!!!! But OKAY, since she defended, it's to spend quality time together. What a stroll, Sha..

Saturday.. absolutely one of the days I hope, I could sleep in. But gotta wake up damn early to go majlis. Which we WALKED from blk 850, to blk 742, Tampines. Chuber egh. Lengitnyer kaki aku blom abes, mintak ampon!!! It's far okay. It's not like walking from Blk 850, to blk824.. Heh.

I wass pissed with one of us. I mean pissed, as in she has no manners to grab the what supposedly to be mine.... Like hello!!!! Okay, fine. Kept my cool. Very unlikely of me, with her.. Pasal aku da fenings dan fenats okay.

Headed to Tekno after majlis. Grab some food. Apparently, the fries were just not up to the usual standard. It's wrinkly. Tanx, Khiz for making us laughed till Nadrah teared and sprained.

There was no training, but meeting. And me trying to sell off the Khatu tix to them. SOMEONE please buy!!!!!!!!!!!!! Halfway through the meeting, the rest, apparently non-committee members were to wait while they discussed. I should have guessed we were more than nuisance to them. Waited and chit chat. End of the day; kept me thinking. But something out of the many things made me smiled throughout my journey home in 34. (when I listen to Smack That, reminded me of boyfie's action moves.. i doubt he remember that.)

Sunday was no better.Except, Khiffry made everybody's day. I HATE PLAYING WAITING GAME WITH THE PENGANTINS OKAY. They can so fusSo in a way, Khiffry made our day when he actually did a solo act when all we need is just gamelan instrumental. I simply think the weekend's not a blast. I guess my hands been itching for my pay!!!!!! I wanna go shopping @ transit!! Levi's got seasonal sale!! Pooft.

Mommy, I want a PSP. and those Baby-Gs(white ones n gold ones) and Esprit watches, Levi's and so much more, I swear to God.

Random stuffs and ramblings.

2006-12-06T22:47:00.000+08:00

Twice I got the answer correct, and twice, luck isn't on my side. Hmmph. Anyway, I was talking about the Dan & Young's "did he just say that" game. Nvm. That made my day. I can't believe I almost laugh on the way to work this morning.I was tuning in to Muttons in the Morning.They were making a stupid joke, or rather remark. And I laughed.How stupid can I be? Well, that made my day.

Caris was back today.It was supposed to be a visit.Yea. And Nic,Kak Marlina,Caris and myself had lunch together. Speaking of my supervisor, Kak Marlina, that is, we're shifting to T1!!!! Heh. The transfer will only begin in January.So yea, at least a month of sufferings with RHA.It's not tough helping out with that.It's the people there.Poor management problem is one thing, they do not know how to maximise their own resources. Ok, period. I'm loooooooooking forward to it la. Besides, our office will be damn near to Popeyes.Like almost everyday can eat Popeyes. (Ye, makin gemok la akuuuuuu) I still love T2's transit. But I can't stand RHA right now. T1's gonna be great, I hope.

I don't suppose I'll blog tommorow, since there's trng. (But i'll blog on Friday.. Cuz, C087 is gonna have a finale!! It's @ Riverside Restaurant, and Ms Rashidah & Ms Rohaya ar ecoming as well!!! Sha, bwk camera!!!!) Yea, and I hope the turnout's (for trng) gonna be better. Then next two weeks will be more intense trng. Hey, I thought of rewarding myself with an "off" day after the whole thing. I just thought of spending the day with the beloved, then I realised that I have an engagement invitation. My kuzzie, Abg Luth is getting engaged.With.. errr, I dunnoe who.Yups, weird.Usually I know roughly who my prospect cousin-in-law is. I was thinking of long bus rides....shopping (ehem) with the boyfie.. It's the 24th and I was trying to plan something again, yet it failed. Good try, Ain. Come next time!

Wait! Engagement...Hmmm.. The BIG question is, what shall I wear??? I don't really bother to wear fanciful, colourful stuffs. Make me look like makcik. I hate that okay.I'm not even 20 la. Which is why, I'd rather wear casual outfit even to weddings and what other invitations. I can't be bothered. Unless of course, if I'm somehow part of the BIG thing. Like that of next year... heeee.. Sis tying the knot, and I'm planning what I'm wearing for both days.. (Macam fish kan?? Nak jadi pengantin..mentelx heeeee) Except that I had almost totally forgotten about the tudung part. Yes, Ain you have to wear that or people talk. You know how your relatives are like. I'm the black sheep, and their daugthers and grand-daughters and nieces are NOT.

Ok, side tracked. Back to the engagement... I've no outfit. I'm already bored with the outfits I wear to work. Everyday I have to cram my head for what to wear. And I'm late not because I overslept, but I change my outfit the very last minute. So, i guess, I have to figure something out. But I swear I'm not going to wear any baju kurungs okay. That's for Hari Raya. Too much of a hassle.Like I care what they are going to say. And it's only some engagement. Come, eat, chit chat. Right? True. Now chuck that out fo my mind.

I missed the long bus rides with arguments, laughter and big hugs. When is that going to be, when we have less time with each other?

It's the time of the month, girls.

2006-12-05T23:58:00.000+08:00

And so it is! No cramps as yet. Just PMS. I forgot my purpose to blog. Surely not to tell the world it's the time of the month.... Lemme see.............

Ok, yup. And indeed, the the time where I have alot to think about. Where works seeks my commitment, intelligence, communication, my other world, which evolves around mainly the comp, meetings, trainings seek my commitment, coorporation, motivation, examplary act of being punctual, whihc is inevitable since I'm not in the school precinct due to SIP. And why the hell am I speaking English? My brain juices are indeed working, and pumping juices out.

To begin my period was, a text msg from Fid, whom, pointed out my sweetest mistake. In the time to rush for submission, I lost focus on the rima on patani.Gawd. Why didn't anybody pointed out way earlier? When I finished my patani part long before? I had known all along there'd bound to be mistakes, which I did not deliberately do. I'm still kinda pissed with myself for overlooking that. So much for rushing. Two working days to complete it. (working day or what. Reminded me again of my yet to receive pay) Minus points, anyway.

But don't be discouraged, girls.That is if you are reading this. We'll work out on other parts. I have to make sure 7 people to proof read the set before I hand in for any submission. I hope the judges will not have any idea who Mawar Hitam is.

Now I know what exactly that brings me to blog, when I should be in bed, reading myself to sleep. Obviously, it's the attendance which has not been doing well. I don't think I should blog in our blog.It's my two cents not even worth it. So, if you tune in to my blog, you'll read.Maybe you can just exit my blog. pooft.

See girls, the problems that often lies in us are, attendance and manpower. When I thought I've tackle the manpower problem, the attendance start making noise. Maybe you girls think I or rather these I/Cs should be more lenient about attendance.Yup, lenient is the word. Yet it does not apply to our trainings, especially when the word COMPETITION exists along those lines. Intense should be the word that compliments the latter. And I think I've been too lenient.

At the number of manpower we have, we should be coping well with the attendance. That is what should be happening right now. Again I thought to myself, could it be a problem with the seniors that the juniors think it's right to follow.If it is, what is that? Seriously, what scares me most is that word COMPETITION, when the attendance is not even close to 30%. Doesn't the word COMPETITION ring the bells???

Maybe I should be more optimistic about it, afterall.Yea. i should be open about it, and believe in myself that I can tackle this very problem. Wow! That is sooooo optimistic la. This isn't a plea. But I really hope once the term test's over, I'd see full attendance. The training is going to be very intense.Hence, I don't wish to start any later than 6.45pm.Girls, you've been forewarn.There is no excuse not to skip training when all we have is a term test week, which I doubt many are having more than 3 papers, and a term break which almost all of you are free.

This brings me to another matter. Is it me, or just the communication breakdown? Come for the trainings, and I hope we can re-bond those friendships. Make our journey towards the comp memorable, right? Which, leads to discipline during trainings.And no, I'm not pin-pointing anybody.It's just some basic rules. We can laugh, but let's not laugh too much, or be too engrossed in your own chit-chat/cam-whoring session when every other members are waiting for your precious moments to end. We are all as 1. As such, yea, we share jokes. And keep all those inside jokes to ourselves.

Am I asking too much? Well, human is to err. I don't wish to repeat that same mistake by the previous times. But if I did, tell me. And yes, I'm not the kind of Ain who will shout or reprimand anybody. I prefer keeping quiet. Or rather, keep it to myself. Lesson learnt. Hehs.

Let's make this happen.My second last dreams for us to make it happen.

And bie, stop being so jealous over nothing. I know it's the time of the month.For me. Not you. Cheer up, and I love you.

2006-12-01T17:50:00.000+08:00

Supervisor treated Caris, Zul, Niki & myself to Deli France. I missed deli france. So I had potato gratin.Ate and chatted. It was supposed to be Caris' and Zul's farewell lunch. Then my larling Caris, asked Niki & me to tag along. Heh.

Since, it was Caris' 2nd last day (she said last 2nd day, btw) and er last day to go into transit area, we went and instead of doing any work, we took photos. Ouh, dan layankan dier shopping. Damn it! She got that Adidas Original perfume before me!!!!

The purple butterfly. I want to take and hang it in my room. Beautiful, I tell ya..
Hohoho!! Santa is fat. And he's made of styrofoam!!

And I actually tried to get the butterfly in the well.Cuz, that's where they keep the extras.

That was yesterday, though.

Today....everything is ruined.Maybe it's just me. Or vivo city.

My co-plans to go Vivo City was cancelled the very last minute. Well, I re-thought, since that is for the rich, and I have no money, might as well don't go. Waste time only. My heart hurts only. So, the backup plan was to catch some movies. Had wanted to watch Happy Feet, Open Season and Step Up (again) with the boyfie. But due to unforeseen circumstances, it wasn't cancelled, stood up? No no.. play safe with the words, Ain. It's cancelled. Yuh. So it is.

And now? Feeling damn idiotic, miserably bord, otak blank, useless, penniless..Whatever-less. To sum it up, on a Friday, of all the days, I've to be so boring. It is me, or is it just the boredom that lingers?

Anyway, larling Caris will be off to school on MOnday. Haha. Come back soon, my friend. No more dirty talks and gossip grossips. No1 to cause me to lose when I'm playing Sweetopia. And Nicholas, yup, Niki treated us, including Ms Marlina our supervisor, to Sakae Sushi!!! Weeee~ I think I had nothing but my Unagi sushi. I love unagi that I had 3 plates of unagi sushi. Btw, unagi is eel. Then I had sashimi, potato sumthing, had forgotten the name and fried salmon.

Notice the word "treat" guys? Heh. Macam tau2 jek aku tgh penniless.But no, I'm not a free loader. They wanted me to come along mahh. Will treat them back when got my long awaited pay.

Hope you're okay. We go Sakae, one day orite?

2006-11-29T10:50:00.000+08:00

Another 10 days to wait, for a meagre pay.. Yup, while the rest of the interns here have received and spent their 1st pay.... *sad, pouts*

2006-11-28T19:42:00.000+08:00

Wah time my heart boiling over the hils and faraway.. I finally got my long awaited 1st SIP paycheque. However, my name was spoiled wrongly laaa. Instead of the beautiful NOR'AIN, they spelled NOR'AINI. Tak mengamok aku??? Very mangkok you know.

Dalah the process itself took 10 days.Hence I only got my cheque long after the rest of the interns used up theirs. Then this has to happen, meaning I have to wait longer. I doubt CAAS automates their process handling. Urghhhhh... I supposed, either i'll be fasting, or eating cup noodles. Really sia.. already the temp staff make me very mangkok, now this. Kalau dapat allowance takpe...

They'd better counter sign my cheque asap. What the ????

I MET SANTINO FROM PROJECT RUNWAY 2!!!

2006-11-23T23:41:00.000+08:00

Yep. No kidding. Boy, was I stunned. Had wanted to take photos with him, but darn it, I was on duty. Imagine a girl using her hp to text her boyfie, and time the process rate using hp stopwatch and also take photos of Santino.. I was that idiot.

He's cool, i tell ya. And he's goin KL. Urghhh.. Asal bukan Ryan Star ke Wentworth Miller?? Well, at least, his unexpected appearance made our day, aftr sort of being rejected by 2 other flights.

And I love transit!!!! My wishlist getting longer sia. That Sweet poison watch, that Esprit bronze with diamante watch, that Levi's jeans, that Carlo Rino bag, that Bonia bag not for me, those perfumes.. I wish it's raining bucks. A pity they dun have Topshop or Mango or VS or Guess, for that matter.

And now, I was pissed. Pissed lah.. Never ever get to meet the boyfie more than 5 mins. How bad is that? I love the chatting session, where he talks, I listen, I talk he listens.That's sweet for me. I need no candlelight dinner or anything.Something simple could mean so much. Awwww...
I'm easily contented.

Then, what pissed me off is that, I still have yet to get my $100+ pay. Yep, long after everybody else has gotten theirs.I hope by next early week la. Got pay oso no more allowance.Must pay bills some more..Then cannot shop, must scrimp and save. That's why I hate filthy rich spoilt brats lorrr.And one more thing, I lost my green hari raya brooch. Like shit, rite? Must have dropped somewhere when I'm otw home. That's what happen when I have to go back home alone, and very pissed. So pissed that I almost cry. Arghhhhh!!!! Hirok-pikok!!!!

Well, here's to ya, girl! Happy boobyday to Fishy. Heh.. She got excused from coming to trng, yet she still come. Member contoh. May love be with you, and may you not be stalked by anymore stalkers. And 1 more wish, only you know it yourself. Heheh. Muackies.

2006-11-20T19:27:00.000+08:00

For Fish, who's been wondering who's Ryan Star, that hot and gorgeous rockstar supernova dude, this is him. And Fish, I can understand if you say he's not hot nor gorgeous. Our standards differs.

So.. my Ryan Star..He was in Singapore last Friday @ Zouk. V Party, by invite ONLY. Yak dish!

And here's another... I was was bored la.. So to say..

But the Boyfie's the best.Where can I ever find the gemok boy with babats, with goatee, can lullaby me, ~~irritate me~~ and love me?

stressed out till i feel like i wanna bang my head on the walls.

2006-11-18T17:37:00.000+08:00

When i am bloggin at this hour, it surely mean one thing; I am at home almost the whole day, AND was bored to death, and I missed so many things.

I had wanted to, and could follow the boyfie to catch his first ever public performance; but last night he said NO. So, here I am at home. Then, he went off for the PRSS's hari raya show @ tp. Darn it. I cancelled my plans to watch it, cuz i thought i could go with him to the show, then now i missed this show n he went.

yup. boiling.. now over the hills n far away.

I am supposed to get my pay check by last fri.Yesterday, dat is. But I still didnt get. My cash's running very low. Very, i mean it. And worst, I found out from another intern, we only got about $100+ for last month's pay. Ergh!!! So much for my plans to buy the essentials. Prolly, I don't buy anything yet. Since my freaking pay is so meagre. I must pay my bills with this pay sumore...Then no more allowance.. Yada yada.. When all the others got their allowance, I DID NOT get any!! Imagine betapa stress nyer aku. Kalo $100+ tu mcm $1000 takpe... Maybe, I should try my luck with CAAS, who knows they'd wanna recruit me, then I have no worries looking all over the island for a freaking job.

How to buy the essentials when I get only $100+ for last month's pay, and I have to use it damn wisely to pay my bills and lunches.Some rules to endure: No fast foods. If I do, then no lunch for the next day. More cup noodles. Dun be fussy, even if i hate that food, i haf to have it, if that's the only food i can afford. Discipline.

MY another ultimate stress: I have yet to start writing!! I duf have any idea yet to even draft in my mind about what to write. I am sooooooo stressed up, i feel like crying. Ouh, dun be sucha crybaby, Ain. Shut up and use your brains instead! I thought of almost anything, but now i wonder, how effectively can I write?

So, I am stressed up. Yet, I am trying not to explode yet. Cuz, all I wanted to be, is to be happy. It's hard, isn't it? To be happy, when you're all stressed up?

I get stressed up when I....

am @ home all day, with nothing to do, and no one to go out with.
did not get my allowance, cuz I am no filthy rich spoilt brats.
could not get on to work, when the deadline is getting nearer, by the day.

I'm a very lucky intern.

2006-11-17T00:26:00.000+08:00

I swear, for now, I am. Happy lorr... get great ~~gossip~~, no! GROSSIP buddies, Caris and Niki.. Then great supervisors, approachable managers..And 1 and only laughing stock! I love my SIP. Sure thing I am. Just now our Mr Lum treated the whole unit, except Andrew the new staff and the laughing stock to Bali Thai. And gawd!! the food was fab! I was full till I was hoping my pants won't rip off that moment! Then some more can grossip uh..

And, the managers encourage us to stay with CAAS. Happening shit arh! Pasal aku pon jakon dapat masok transit! Hahaha. Ok ok ok.. I really do hope my application later will get through. So, I and Caris can have our grossip moments and rewind the beautiful stuffs.

Anyways, speaking of transit... RYAN STAR is in Singapore lahhhhh!!! And he's performing tmr @ ZOUK's V party.. And darn.. it'a by invite only!! And, there's Hady Mirza as well.. I think there's teriyaki boys as well... Now I need to find out when he's going back, so I can go transit!!Unless he goes back on weekend, then I cant lahh...But I think he's going to Zouk KL pulak... Urghhhh!!!He's gorgeous.. (korang imagine jer yat with fine abs...) Wentworth miller lagi gorgeous la siakkk..

I love you more than you love me.

Hate Tag

2006-11-13T23:48:00.000+08:00

Why hate tag occur? It's like the most irritating thing ever. Yet the stupidest thing too. See, maybe you hate the person, and did not want the person to know how much your hatred has reached the boiling point. Maybe, you don't even know the person, but you "hated" him/her out of the text that may have hit you in the forehead.

It's funny, to see friends getting hate tags. I mean, like, can't that person with the hate tag just simply, identify themselves? Hate tag is so childish, you know. I bet you know it yourself how stupid are hare tags, yet you seem to like it, when the person replied. Stupid, unidentified idiot. Will, i get any hate tag for saying this? Blog aku pon lama tk dikunjungi stupid unidentified idiots.

Anyway, just something to share. Cuz, I've been squeezing my brain juices out till I couldnt identify who this person is. Here goes... Once upon a time when I was having rehearsal..

09000900
Starhub Msg:U have just recv'd an SMS sent by ur friend via WebSMS. If you reply 2 the SMS immediately, ur friend can see ur reply on the webpage he/she's on.

090050857
Helo saper buat lagu?

no. hp aku
Sape ni?

090050857
ina

no. hp aku
Ina mane ni??

090050857
NiRa has ended the WebSMS session. Please reply to his/her mobile phone instead.

My first impression, anak sape siak ina? I swear alots of faces going through my mind. People with those names??? And, suddenly when I was having my rehearsal I received that. Then when I asked further qns, she (i supposed) gave up. Yelah, takkan suker2 nk blg org details. First, I did not know who she or he may be. Secondly, What song is he/she talking about? There's alot of songs for Heaven's sake. Or, is he/she talking about the pretty ciplakness of our deeparaya set? Nak ciplak biar orang tahu,tak baik berahsia. Bile orang tetiba dapat tahu, kan paiseh.. ye tak?? OUCH!

So, since I got no response from that person, I claimed that he/she must be an amateur stalker of mine. Kaozzz stalker or what! And coincidently, caca got a hate-tagger by the name of NIra. Buat malu name nira jekk.

Welcome back, hate taggers!

And, yuh I love my SIP-ping friends. Except one. Heh. Gonna miss you, your gossips and your dirty jokes, Caris. When you're back in school.

And i will always miss my yoyot boyot. You touched me by those words.

mendak. sungguh mendak.

2006-11-11T20:05:00.000+08:00

My Saturday will soon be gone. Wasted just like dat. Yep. With a snap of the finger. I'm not that mad. Just hmm. Itz just gone. Yep. Gone. They had much more fun without me. Well, he said there's no need to go. So, I thought, being me, I'd comply. And I freaking-ly thought it was gonna be a "bachelors" outing. OKay, "bachelors" raya shit. Watever u name it la. Then how come my niecey got to go????

It doesnt make sense anyway. You're going like only for half-a-day, yet u pay $5. den rite, it's like say u're goin off at @ 4, beh mlm ader show lagik, how many house can you make it?

I was full of emosi during the weekdays. Period answered why I was so. But it lingered. The emosi lingered. I feel it. I tried, but somehow... wait, was I wrong again? I think I'm writing in circles. hmmmz..

I missed the little friend whom I used to talk to. Prolly she'd been busy. We missed the contact for quite awhile. I supposed she's busy with her O level. Then... I missed my buncha kacau-bilau friends, yep, the twenty-ouh-five khatu batch. And sritemasek batch. They've all been busy. Heh, aku je tak. And have been hoping for this batch or atleast some to return n play for khatu and pentas b4 we grad.

Ya, everything is never forever. Somewhere, somehow it will just perish. To some it may be gone just like that. There's more to come. BUt there are others who still treasure the feelings and bondings we used to share. Esp the kene maki part. I miss u, Kak Ikin!!

It was a very short period. But the memories lived. Pentas Wayang can make Mamat krinting-bastero cried,apatah lagi aku. It was the begining of new friendships. And I hope those friendships live. Eh, ape ni kawan2. Lama2 jadi musibat jugak kan. *shrugs*

I didn't realise this whole mendakness of my Saturday actually got something out of me. It only half past eight now. How slow time past. And it's 3 weeks gone to my SIP. That's how fast it is. I feel it. Nope, I did nt dread my SIP. It's been ermm... 3 or more hours of me sitting here. At my desktop. Lappy's with Sissy. And he's not even texted me. He's mad at me. And I'm mad at my Saturday. Saturday siakkkk. Can you imagine me, not going anywhere on Saturday.

Ok, wait. I did.After I was sort of nagged at for not taking my "niat" to take class 3 liscense seriously, I went out. Urgh. It's not like I got the money to enrol rite? And yes, I know how long this things take okay. So, stop pressurizing me! Confirm nanti dpt pay, kene nag lagi. Wah, org tua ni makin tua, makin la nagging jadi hobby baru. That's the very reason, I'd rather be out, doing something. And i'm making myself busy as possible.

So,I just went to skool, to take the freaking new yet ugly matric card. Then, I thought I could manipulate his mind to meet me. I failed. Certified failure. I ended up lunching with Sha and Hannah @ LJS. And, err.. sorta window-shopped again. Yelah, takde duit nak beli ape.. kan? And I'm running out of outfits to wear to work. SISSY: if you're reading, i've got one of the things you wanted for your hantaran.

And when SHa and Hannah gotta go, I decided to go lib. I miss lib. So, books again. I was looking for the book entitled "How to be a budget fashionista." Lib miskin agaknya. Blum beli. So, I settled with crime fictions again. AH... speaking of which, it reminded me of the new epidemic. I got almost all the youngsters in my family addicted to Prime Suspect. Even one of my supervisors and the APD people. And, I missed my lappy. I wanna play HUntsville and Apprentice.

Humour me, someone! I think, I've got nothing else to blog about. The time is running slow. He's still not texting me. So, I thought when I blog, I could make the time go a bit faster.

I felt unimportant to ya. Our time seldom coinside uh.

Fury.

2006-11-07T22:47:00.000+08:00

Very inappropriate. Anyways, let's talk about.... liars, lies and people being lied to.

Wait.
First answer this very question: Would trust a liar, whom you've known his/her lies and fallen for the lies? Again?

And lemme get this straight, if the target is reading, very well, go on and show it to those who'd love to trust your beauty lies and whats not. I have no regrets posting this entry. I am not much of an adult to voice my thoughts. Well, at least, I have brains that get to a poly, even if I couldnt get any higher than that. Did you? Did you even completed your N level? *smirk* I am rude. You're worst. So much for thinking you could be the good exemplary one. I WAS WRONG.

But I have no regrets. Everyone make mistakes. And most people do learn from them. I was one of those people. And i'm still making mistakes.

So... this liar.... Nope, I am not gonna trust. Apparently, we came from the same hole. We were raised differently too. But I think I've made a good choice. I know where I came from. That hole. How about you? Ouh, people. this liar, I tell you, never stops. Never stops and always played the game the same way. Once bitten, twice shy for me. For others who've been warned against, yet still choose to believe the lies, go on. I pray that you're gonna be hit worst than us all. Macam ak gi kat dorang, taplek dorang ker, kasi satu tapak tangan kat dorang power giler punyer, kene mara ker, kene maki ker, kene panggil kurang ajar pon tak kisah arh (kita jahat pe), tapi asal dorang dengar cakap, pakai otak yang makin menua tu sikit. {Opps! I didnt mean to use harsh words. Got carried away la}

The lies.. It's always been the same. The same style. Same format, ikot kata IT. If it's not about one family's dirty laundary, it's another family. Then when first attempt almost failed, cuz very few would believe, there's always plan B. Very well-prepared. Laid chill. Cuz that way, people will think ouh, the liar's tired of the game. No, THE LIAR IS NEVER TIRED OF THE GAME. This time round, the liar managed to enchant the wise man, or so, I thought. Of all the people!! Yep. Now, that's where my fury comes in. Cuz,this time round, is the lies about both my lovely families. BOTH.

The liar claimed that, it's all because of the word "panas". (Hot or warm, you know the surrounding) Yep. Eh, dgr2 aku da bilang. Ah ni tengok baik2, nak print jadikan evident, sila kan..... Kita tak kisah kene maki atas bawah ngan orang tua. Alah bisa, tegal biasa. Kadang ni pun, orang tua pon kene dengar cakap kite jugak kan...

So, the liar lied. Saying we provoked it (no he or she la.) Provoke or wat! Like hello!!!!!! Yes, hello with the big wave to you! The innocent kids, whom you claimed were rude, were queuing up for the food la kan. This included me. Okay. No choise arh, orang tua takde, terpaksa pegi dekat ngan kids. Then out it goes, from an AIR-CONDITIONED room, and out past us, saying the word "Eh panas arh tempat ni!" I would not have thought anything. OK, aku ni lembab. There's actions to the said words. Very agitated and arrogant kinda actions. So, what was I thinking. It was then I realised it came out from an air-con room, saying panas??? Ape Singapore pon da pandai pakai heater ker? Setahu aku heater only for shower.. Wahhh.. dier pikir aku budak2 ker.. Budak2 tu ha yang komplen kat orang tua. And hell, yes kite tersinggung!

Next episode of "panas": 4 days later... This poor old woman just arrived, with the daughter. Dengan niat nk datang kenduri. IKHLAS. Yela, sape kuase nk dtg stakat gado kan? Takmo pikir pokemon la. Someone asked, "tak duduk dapur? " (dun want sit here, in the kitchen?) This old woman answered, "Taklah, panas arh kat situ" (no, thanks. It's hot in there.) Kaoz, then came that liar, very frustrated, thinking the old woman was hinting at it. Like ???? kan? Question marks tu macam ibarat aku pon stoink gitu arh.. The liar complaint to the deceased daughter. Cuz, I was pretty sure, it thought it was the old woman's daughter's doing. Nope, it was the person, which it came from.

This story took place months after the liar left home. And it said instead, it left home because of this provokes. Think again, wise man...We thought we could always count on you. I have always admired you. But today, you let us down. You let me down, personally. Cuz, A thing so simple, you couldnt solve it wisely. Does the liar's lies make sense? I always question this: why didn't you make us all, yes all those involved sit together, and talked it out. Why didnt that liar, whom you trusted dared to even come and face the angry yet disappointed faces of the parents?? Why? The liar wanted to wait till they closed their eyes? Sedang kan si Tanggang menderita sampai mati, sedangkan bangkai bernyawa nazak selagi tak terima kemaafan ibu.. Now you tell me.

I am waiting for the moment the liar mess things over at those people who had trusted her. I want to laugh. You know what, nampak sah korang mintak mahap kat mak bapak aku dua2 tak ikhlas.. I almost cried when I see the old woman face. The last thing I want on their minds are worries. I want all my parents happy. To think there is this one idiot have to mess my happy family fantasy. Thank you. And may you rot till death.

Lastly, I apologize to all those who might have been hurt in course of my ranting above, as you know, they involved your direct relations. I am very sorry. But this involved my family's pride. And to you, liar, better play your game right.

And so, bie, back to our story...would you go out with me when i ask u to? or you;d rather go with the friends? It hurts. You dunnoe.

Syawal Outing with the Tekno Peeps

2006-11-06T09:56:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday, I had to turn down a work opportunity in order to go RAYA-ing with the Tekno peeps. Work on Saturday means potential free day.

Overall, the whole thingy was fun. Though there was 1 part, the heat was troublesome. I was getting agigated due to my freaking allergy. But then again, I had fun. The boyfie and I went green. So, this weekend we're going with the panjy people.. And one thing for sure, Aliff the keds better watch out! For Heaven's sake, he "stole" my body splash!!

Treehouse!!!! {Ada org tgh maintain hensem pasal dier takot heights!!!} Click here for more photos.

And now, I'm re-listing my wishlist. Hehs.. Cant wait for the upcoming hols. And I love my SIP!!

2006-11-03T09:46:00.000+08:00

Been busy. And lethargic. Been eons since I wake up early. I can't wait for holidays to come visit me again. After SIPping, is pure vacation till a company wants to take me in. I wish I could continue working here even after SIPping. I like the ambience, the office surrounding, the food, the people,cuz most of them aren't racists and it's a purely multi-racial place to be. It akes me happy. And I love working here. I am easily inspired.

Then again, I hope to go on a real vacation. Jump on an airplane and take off to countries.. Wowness. Shopping... Beaching...

Work's been good.. Nothing much. Mendak la actually.

Pemalas kan sumer?? No work mah.. And nope, this is not our office. Only on standby for the AUdit. Free lah we all. Only busy when we're going back home, cuz that's the time the Auditors end the meetings. Kiter sochai kene kemas la, buat documents la.

But, work's been great. BUt I miss Flavours and Jupiter Cafe, and Norgen Vaaz, and err.. tp lib.. I miss skool. I miss bitching and lunching with the makchik kepos, I miss my long lunches b4 starting our MP.. Worst of all, I miss tekno. I miss uncle soon. I miss my teh peng kata @ Tekno. I miss my chicky chop.

Yesterday, I was in the bus with some kids going koleksyen. Like what the toot la, they all look at me one kind. Cuz, prolly i jus look like any other kid. Kecik and cute mahh.. Like hello!!! I'm finishing my poly studies soon!!! And you're like, still got a long way in sec school?? Rilek suah. Senyum ngan budak2 ni pon tak guna. Dorangs tgk aku atas bwh. Tau la aku ni cute. Korang tu huge. Macam nk tanye "are you kids like M18 already?" Ader chan beli rokok pon tak lepas.

Speaking of which, I'm going Raya-ing with the tekno peeps tmr. And Panjy guys next weekend. Hope I do enjoy la. And hope I could cover back the expenses for the outings.Harap maklom ekh, aku da tak dapat allowance.So, if u guys got even $2 from your parents per day tu da kire bagus. Ker, $10-$20 per week, pon da bagus. Jangan komplen mcm aku ni.Garmen kiter ni ekh, part2 buat rules n regulations about smoking and whatever illegal shit, senang2 jer. Part hak asasi anak2.. Eh, hak asasi tu aper ekh? Nvm, kids' welfare, tak bikin pulak. BUat la, children below 21 have the rights to ask for school allowance ker.. Like, the younger you are, the lesser you get. So for above 18 must get between $300-$400.Dalah aku tak dapat Edusave, cuz when I was born there's no such thing as edusave for 4th child and below. Only 1st-3rd child. And what, the second one always wasted the edusave??? Kasi aku kan baik, dulu bole gi overseas fieldtrip ngan skola, ker, join segala macam workshop. So, i'm deprived of sec shool days. That's why I hate my sec school days, ok.

Sure thing arh, when I want to continue studies no garmen or other welfare org bodies to help. Then summore, 2 yrs after i finish poly still must pay the cpf. Where to get money tell me. When the ppl still wont wanna take me in.Hmmphs.

Listening to the song, why do we always fight? - byz. Tell me, bie. Have I changed? Am I full of vulgarities?

2006-11-01T09:43:00.000+08:00

I'm down with sinus. (gitu ekh spelling??) My nose been running and running. I hate it. Can I cut it out, den wehn I'm ok I put it back? Hell. I skipped trng cuz was too tired and sick. Of all the times!! I was such n irritating bitch sneezing and blowing my nose.

Was thinking of taking an MC. on 9 nov. Since I could not get my time off, due to the Audit going on. But Zul too MC, anyway. Yup, and anyway, Zul's another intern @ AvSec Unit. He's from Biz skool. So he ends this Dec. And, he's Aliff the guy who calls me Zebra's fren. And He's also Zaki's fren. And, the last thing I found out, aftr the f- break, he's Sharifah Hazirah's bf. She's Sharifah Munirah's younger sis. What a damn small world.

Heran.

2006-10-28T23:52:00.000+08:00

So, I've not been updating my blog. I'm too tired to even think okay. Someone help with the lyrics plssss!!!! I'm too busy with my SIP. And besides, I dun get a table of my own. But we did get cubicle. Hoho. And besides, there's no Internet connection, @ the lappy. Bacin-ness.

We went RAYA-ing. The two families. Again. Bagaimana kah, bisa ku ceritakan ini???? Herrrraaannn. Yep. Standard arh. One corner. Lela, ko confem tau. We hafta go together as 2 families cuz, we gotta be together and.. yuh inside jokes.. Then went to the place we wish we dun hafta go. Dammit Lela, ko tk gi. Benci aku. Da macam budak CINE. Aper sajerrr. Orang dtg muke bonyok, masam berkulat. Taplek bisu ha padan muke ko. Btol kata Ira, da dpt bukak tuds, makin melampaui batas pulak pakaian. Btol kata Lela, dorang kan cina. Mana pakai baju kurung. Orang dtg pakai jeans and baju lobang2. Minahs n mats like us jer pe pakai baju kurung. Harap maklom ekh, ku tak mintak mahap pon ngan dorang. Tak perlu. Muek plastic siakkk. Layankan laaaa. Opps!

Kalo ko rase terkurung, salahkn upbringing korang yg terkongkong. Beh, kalo tk suker kite dtg umah ko, aku pon kalo bole tanak jejak umah kao. Tak perlu. Tarebeng. Dalah tak penderr.

Luahan Rasa - BINGET

2006-10-28T01:34:00.000+08:00

Binget. Baju bunge2, macam budak kampong. Korang nak?

Binget. Da tak dapat duit skola pasal attachment. Korang dapat? Dasar bdk pampered.

Binget. Bnyk benda nak beli, tapi duit mcm toot; orang pk aku bnyk duit kaper?

Binget. Bnyk bende kene pk.

Binget. Dapat colleague budak MWC sesungguhnyer irritating shit. Dalah pemalas, asek nk slack jer, orang tgh busy tanye soalan bodoh, beh buat keje sembarang sesuke hati mak dier pey abang ipar, pey atok sdare nyer nurse.

Binget. Makin ramai sedare-mare yg dulu kecik2 pakai tuds, skrg sumer bukak tuds, makin tk btol. Pelik aku tgk mak bapak dorang... Beh aku? Bukak ckit kene marah. Cibeh la, aku bukannyer skola madrasah ker ape ker. Mak2, kiter sumer dulu2 pon boel pakai mini skirt, sleeveless.. Asal aku tak bole?????

Binget. Pasal budak2 yg dulu2 kecik2 pakai tuds la, aku kene pakai tuds. Skrg ramai da bukak. Abe aku? Kan ker dulu aku kene pakai sal dorang pakai. Ni dorang da bukak.

Binget. Kerana, tkde yg nk paham.

DAN KALIAN TAK PERLU NK COMMENT APAPE KALO NK MENYAKITI. PASAL AKU DA BINGET.

Eid Mubarak!

2006-10-24T02:05:00.000+08:00

Dalam menyambut Syawal ni, aku terpikir... Apakah puasa ku ini akan diterimanya?? Maklumlah, kita umat manusia ni kan selalu leka.. Tak, andai rase terkureng, tahun depan chuber lagik..

I still don't feel any Raya celebration going around. Even after the whole Takbir thingy, after I broken a record, for the first time ever went Geylang the night before Raya, after I ironed my Baju Kurung and hang it up... Nope, I still I did not feel any sense of celebration. I supposed, it's just another holiday. And I can only look forward to weekends for outings. Nonetheless, I wanna make my Syawal wish come true; to be the happiest person later.. Cuz I get to be with both my families.Sure kekekness. And, I STILL WANNA GET MY DUIT KOLEKSYEN!!!!!

So,I took a few snaps of how my house looked like...
Familiar tak???

Lagi familiar????
Ye, betol!!! Memang familiar..
To those still not familiar, silalah beli VCD Syaitan Menangis. Baru familiar.. Cheyy promote or what! Beginila rumah ku. Kerana dah siap kemas, maka, Aku menemani Mama dan Auntie Midah ke Bazar Geylang. Maka, untuk pertama kali, aku ke Bazar Geylang pada malam Raya. Coolshit. It's not that packed; I supposed most of them went to the Suria Raya thingy la. Hahaha.. Fanatics.

We're 14th months, bie.. You remember?? That's why I hoped to be happy.

Halfday.

2006-10-23T14:39:00.000+08:00

SO I went home early. Half-day for the Muslims.

The start of the day was, well, Monday blues. But for me, it was more of butterlies in my stomache. Cuz, I did not know what to expect. So, I woke up @ 6+. The alarm in my brains triggered much earlier than expected. For the first time ever after months, I finally woke up in the morning. Even during sem 1 I woke up late.

So, yea, got ready and such. Well, thanx to my room's clock, I thought I was damn early. Hell, by the time I left home , it was 7.55. (I thought it was 7.45). Baik arh jam. Of all the days, yuh. I hate waiting for bus, more than 10 minutes. More than 5 minutes, I was already frustrated. And I remembered clearly the bus reached @ 8.06am.So travelled. I forgot how many bus stops to depend on. I texted Esther bunny, ask if she's anywhere in the airport vicinity. She reached okay. Since I did not take note of how many bus stops, I thought I could do well with the given bus stop number. All i know , according to the freaking streetdirectory, I'm to alight @ PTB1, which I thought was Terminal 1.

Since the previous night I had asked Sissy, if the NTUC was T2, so, i go according it. Pls take note, that my stupidity and blurness is due to the period I've not been going to Airport.

Apparently, teh bus stop which I alighted, was, indeed the one with NTUC, but it was of course, T1. Baik arh. Time check, it was 8.23am. I still got about 7 minutes to run to T2, via skytrain and search for the office. And hell, I've to talk for about 4 minutes upon reaching the lift lobby. By the time I reached, it was 2 minutes past 8.30am. Ok, at least I was not the last to arrive. And we waited before we were called in around 9am, in to the meeting room.

It was deafening and foreign being left in the meeting room. Cuz nobody speaks. Even if we did, we spoke in low voices. Imagine arh loud speaker ni bobal pelan2. I think, around 9.25 then the coordinator came in and spoke to us. Sorta like an orientation or rather briefing. It went on till 10.10 am. Then our SUpervisors took us. I was attached to Aviation Security unit, with Airport Management. Weee~ Sounds gerek. Reached our Unit. That's me, Charles & Nicholas from MWC. We were again, briefed by the Asst Manager. After which, we were ushered into an "empty" cubicle. 3 persons in 1 cubicle. Yep. Waited to be given a task to do. And finally our task arrived @ around 12.... So, i did my 1st task, till 12.32pm. It was fast. Senang pe.. Then, home sweet home.

And you know what? I think I forgot how to go there.

Raya mood, but not really. Something's wrong with my tummy. Its been grumbling alot since morning. Ok, sabar Ain.. 1 more day. A few hours left jerrr.

With this, i declare, I DID NOT step into the freaking, psychotic yet fanatic Kg Glam bazaar or that Suria Raya thingy. It sounded, and looked boring. Geylang is still the best ambience for Hari Raya. Though it's hot and stuffy with the people. I think if Kg Glam does not include SUria Raya thing, I might have gone and take a look. Seriously, Suria, has lost a lot of good talent. SO, tell me, why should we support it? I rather support Arts Central siak. It's really lame and boring. Patah balek same artist. Kalo bagus tak pe. Suria only want looks la. Why not make a talent quest for those not handsome or pretty. I'm sure they can attain alot of talents. Ouh, anybody watched Cinta Q? Boring nyerrrrrrrrr.

So, whatever. Cuz, i doubt I'd watch alot of Suria. I'll switch to Ch 5, or Arts Central or Vasantham or M'sian & Indon channels.

Ermm... Eid Mubarak, all Muslims!!!! Mintak ampun dan mahap ekh, kawan2. Yang diumpat tu, kalo terase tu, jgn la terase lagi. U're no the only ones. Yang dimaki tu, ko pon same. Not the only ones. Bnyk lagi yang senasib. Yang ter-diambil barang dan segala harta karun korang, sebenarnya bukan begitu. Aku terlupe nk bagi balik. Ada chan dah tak tau mane.. Pada yang dipukul tu, bukan tak sengaja, memang tangan ni pantas nk taplek yang terrible-marble. Sekali-sekala, mahh.. 0-0 eh? Macamla korang pon tk umpat sal aku, maki aku blkg2, Amek bende aku tak kasi balik, bingai...pukul aku sesuker hati mak korang.. Beh kan, confem len kali aku jumpe korang aku ulang benda sama. Standard arh kire ekh.

P/S: I am still eligible for duit raya. Jangan sampai aku kluarkan student pass. Kalo nk kasi tu, $5 and above arh, Kalo merah2 ker biru2 lagi bagus. Semoga Tuhan berkati rezeki kalian.

Do you remember what date is tommorow? It's our 14th month.

Big Day's Coming

2006-10-22T23:09:00.000+08:00

It's tommorow. And i'm soooooooooo worried. Ok, wish me luck. First impression counts alot okay. So yahh.. My Project Supervisorhad better be someone nice and not someone snobby. She's Malay, and she sounds mid-twenties to me. Hope she's like my Ms Marlina, since they've got the same name.

Wish me luck. Okay.

Dear Mr John Perilly. You've made him smile.

Deepavali~

2006-10-22T01:01:00.000+08:00

So, i headed to JB, @ 11am. Goodness! The Causeway was free-flowing... So to say, it is smooth. Tak pernah dalam seumur hidup aku gi JB that smooth the traffic, you know. So, off we went.. First headed to take Achik's, Daddy's n Abg Awie's bajus. Which Achik kept complaining through out about his not having the button. Yak dushh!

Konon nk beli dvd la kans, beh g Pandan. Bacin arh kiter. Pandan mane bukak siang2 buta. BUt on the way in, we passed by this one shop; kedai urutan tradisional. As a normal window-shopper, I'd always happen to turn my head to window displays or whatever la kan.. Then that shop, got some promotion or information display, whatever they call it, the when i read one obscene word, i was stunned. Stunned; yet amused. The word that caught my ultimate attention was "b-o-d-e-k". Then i read further on, it stated "Urutan Alternative" , followed by a list. That says " something2 (lupe arh), saiz zakar kecil, bodek...." I couldn't help myself. When I caught up with Umi, Achik and Wan, at the same time I laugh. Loud. Then wan also laughed. SO he knew. Bacin siak. That was err.. weird. The display was. At a place where public, with kids... You know what I mean? yeah..

After that we went to Angsana, yang penuh sesak ngan umat manusia. Dan orang park sesuke hati mak dorang. And damn it my eye caught a purple songket. Lawa giler babas la siyekk. Then, we went take our kuehs @ 4+. And headed to KTM to break our fast.. Lepas tu, ke Geylang yang penuh sesak ngan umat manusia jugak. Balek happily mkn Dunkin Donuts...

Nak tgk gmbr budak2 giler ni, klik link ini.

Nothing is great without you. That is how important you are to me.

Whooozzz

2006-10-21T02:49:00.000+08:00

Finally, after 6 hours, I'm done with my blog. Kinda miss this trial n error thingy. Confem aku bangun jer, sofa ni panas giler babs ekh. I dunnoe what inspired me to do this. I supposed, twas impromtu. So.. now i'm deciding should I sleep, or sahur alone then slp, or sleep then wake up for sahur???

Eniwei, I'm going JB again tmr!!!

Nites everybody!!

Missing the yoyot boyot.

Pre-SIP briefing.

2006-10-20T00:26:00.000+08:00

The pre-SIP briefing was, erm, boring. Very indeed. Kay and myself could only afford to make our own jokes and such. Aftr Mr VJ said his piece, or rather "motivated" us on our SIP part, we had to meet our LOs. GLC was nice. She looked for me instead. Icouldn't be bothered to look for her, aftr I couldn't find her. So to say, I gave up, waiting in the corner to be called up. Kecoh sunggoh keadaan.

We followed Sya to meet her LO, Georgie. Kekekness. Here goes the conversation between them.

Sya: Cher, why is my SIP only 1 month? Does that mean I have to do in-house SIP after that?
Georgie: Huh?? No lah, 16 weeks; 4 months what..
Sya: No lah, cher. It stated there 1 month.
Georgie: Really arh? When you end?
Sya: 23 Nov.
Georgie: Ok, you wait here, I go check.
Ain: Cher, you click on the company name to see the duration.
Georgie: I know.
Ain: {ouch}

minutes later...

Sebenarnyer, dier tk tau macamaner to get to the information.
Georgie: Here, I see oredi. But how come I see your information here all like distorted??
Sya: It said 1 month only, right?
Georgie: Aiyah, like that, you don't go there on Monday la. Who wants to give 1 month SIP? Then what, you want to go back to TP, do free labour arh?
Sya,Kay,Ain: Can arh like that?
Georgie: Yalah! You think TP wants to send the student only 1 month SIP arh?
Sya: Then how?
Georgie: I go and see Vincent. Ask him to check his DB. Got extra position, can give you. (walking down the stairs)
Ain: abe kiter nk tgu sini?
Kay: Jadi babu dier, arh..

minutes later....

Georgie: He asked me to call Adel. So, i go call him. If he says 1 month, then we dun send you there la..
Sya: Ok. But cher, i dun want free labour arhh...
Georgie: no la, you tink i want arh?
Ain: dun want, den join kay @ NTU la.
Georgie: (askin Kay) whr you got?
Kay: NTU. {padahal aku da ckp}
Georgie: eh good laa.. There got alot of canteen can choose from. {baik arh georgie... mkn jer k igt}

minutes later...

Sya: how??
Georgie: I called, but the person said Adel not around. But there's another TP student intern there as well. doin some networking.
US: who?
Georgie: MWC student
Sya: then?
Georgie: i left him a message. hopefully he call me back. if really they only want you for 1 month, then we give you a new job la. then monday you no need go there.

Poor sya. Easy work, only for 1 month jer.. Pastu gi keje pakai kebaya, cucuk sanggul, blajar tarian. HAHAHAHAHAAHAHA. ok, jkjkjk..

After which, the girlfriends went to Parkway Parade. Break our fast there. Mainly cuz I wanna eat the slice fish noodle. Then Sya had to went off early pasal she suffered indigestion, pasal tk kentot. Jadi angin tak kluar. {duh!} So she went home and had eno. Meanwhile, I entertained Kay (layankan!!!!!!!!!) do some pre-SIP shopping. And we headed home.

Damn. I think I need to refurnished my closet. Need new ones!! Makanya, abang2, kakaak2, dan mika2 yang sepatotnyer kasi aku duit raya, bagi lah lebih2. Jadi gi SIP ader bnyk baju bole pakai.... Banyak2 tau. Dorothy perkins dan Mng dan topshop dah memanggil la...

Missing ya, baby gemok.

Iftar-Training @ Yasmin Cuisine

2006-10-18T17:29:00.000+08:00

So, i turn up for the event.

From home, took 12 to Lasalle, then the boyfie joined me from there. On the way there, damn the ride was long. Was long. I tuned into 98.7fm. Made my day, somehow. There was this one time when Dan said smoking can help reduce weight. I was like, "Coolshit!". So i waited... But hell, where got smoking reduce weight, right? They kept arguing u noe. And I was thinking.Very intensely. If smoking really can help one lose his weight, damn it, Aiman would have lost a lot of weight siakk. Then Dan said, smoking can actually reduce ur weight, one lung after another. Thanks.

Then another one time, when i was along katong, they were chuckling about the current 8 Days magazine, the one with Hady and Taufik on the cover. Since i didnt buy any 8 days, for so long, I listen on la kan. They were wearing leather jackets and cowboy hats (heran). And here goes the tagline: Relax, this is not brokeback. Hahah kekek.

So, we were the first to reach. Then myself and boyfie take a look around @ House of Japan. Pastu we waited by the road. It was a 2-way road. Apparently, there were alot of cars parking. I think illegally. Mane aku kisah siak. Since 1 lane has been used up by the cars, there's one lane left. {duh!} So u noe that the cars from both sides hafta use one one freaking lane, kan? Cibeh u noe. Then there's this one cab. Mak kauz. The driver like, ok, he's a Malay la kanz. He's so the arrogant siak. Come on la, you're not the only taxi driver around. Besides, you're only a taxi driver.

Eventually, that arrogant taxi driver also break his fast 2 the same place. Aku dah tk suker org arrogant. Ni jumpe pulak org cam nih time bulan2 pose.

Eniwei, click here, to see photos of our Iftar-traning @ Yasmin Cuisine.

I miss long rides home, with u.

My JB outing.

2006-10-15T03:32:00.000+08:00

Aftr 8 months, I finally managed to go JB. Purpose is.. I dunnoe what. But never mind la kanz. Met quite a lot of people. SO yuh. The boyfie oso went JB with his frenz. To cut it short, I was quite contented with myself. And I returned home happily with these..

I got BodyGlove wallet. Yippee!! Had wanted a Roxy one, but couldn't find one that suits me. Billabong's too common. Got a new baby; Bean. Ummi took my Joaquim, supposed in xchange I got 2 buy Bean on the way home. And there's D.O.A. Yeayness. Devon Aoki!!! Hot siyekk. Lesbianism.

Only I couldn't find nice shades. Terpakse la head to Bugis. Hmmph.

For more photos, click here. Btw, I've changed from Fotopages to Fotki {thanks to Sha}. Paham2 la mengapa aku pindah iye. I've added new links to my photo gallery, feel free to view at your own pleasure.

I'll get one for you like mine one day, bie.

Cookie-mon!

2006-10-14T00:31:00.000+08:00

Baking process: 67% done.

Set process: 27% done. i tink.

Lenguh la pulak kaki gue ni. Macam berdiri 10 jam kat parade square. ok tu tipu. Kalo tk klua mus-cle pon nasib la kans.

Left about a week +/- to Hari Raya & my SIP-ping. Weeee~

Taking care, bie!

2006-10-12T00:26:00.000+08:00

I watched Lensa Ramadan just now. Well, it did sort of induct some thinking into me. I didn't know that China has some more than 18 million Muslims and over 30 000 mosques. Ok, I have no qualms of going to China for holidays. Too intrigued by their way of fasting and celebration during Ramadan & Syawal, I decided to check upon the Muslims migration to China. So I read up The Revival & Muslims in China. Amazing!

My hand itch to research on this. Cuz, i love Sirah. Well, but of course. I never fail my Sirah ok. But i think I need rejoice my brains with the right facts.

By a website statistics in 2005, there's approximately 1.3 billion Muslims in the world. And someone actually asked "Why is Islam the fasting growing Religion in ther World?". Apparently, I do not know whether it is a valid question or the way it is questioned is valid or not. But it is sad that others hated Islam for that tragic 9/11. Therefore, for the question, I won't add the url here.

Well, then again, Allah mentioned "Bagi kamu agama kamu, bagi aku agama aku." - Ayat keenam, surah Al-Kafirun.

I'm SIPping.

2006-10-11T13:42:00.000+08:00

My attachment's out!

I'm posted to.... Civil Aviation Authority of Singapore (CAAS la kaoz.. kakak2 airport or wat!). Chetz! No wonder, i've been seeing airports.. Like anywhere I go, not really anywhere, cuz I go nowhere, but I see "Changi Airport" and stuff like that. {petanda la tuu} I am going to errr.. let's depict.. "Assist manager in the documentation on the programmes ". Kinda complicated kan?? This sounds like very the BPRT & Workflow..

And my task is to.. "(1)To assist manager in the documentation on the programmes(compiling and distribution of programmes) and preparation for ICAO Audit, and to assist on follow up action after the Audit.(2)To assist in the logistics matters during the Audit period.(3)To assist in the implementation of the new airport pass system project;to ensure that project has been implemented smoothly." Ntahla ape ntah tu Audit sane sini. Bacin tol.

Buat jer arh.. But paling touching marching kan, Special Requirement: {ehem} Good working attitude and integrity.. Well, but of course! I'm on the safe side when I've to work 8.30-6pm. Now.. let's see.... {brb. going to Airport's webbie}

Wahhh.. Senang sungguh nk cari mkn.. Ada Polar (confem mama asek kirim puffs), BK, Mc'D, Delifrance, Popeyes, Marrybrown yg tk sedap dan mahal, Changi Kopitiam, Food Park, Food Gallery @ T1& T2 (ders Thaksin Beef Noodles there i tink..yumyum), Fish & Co., Swenson (okay, skip that both), and there's Auntie Anne's. Yeayness. Ok arh. I won't starve. At least, i tink i'm safe.

OK, kawan-kawan! To those who's got ur attachment, happy working on 23/10 okay. And those who has yet to get anything, let's pray the best. k, kay? Kesian sha kene SriWarisan. hohoho.

Writer's block

2006-10-11T00:14:00.000+08:00

When it's been eons not penning thoughts in poetry, that's what happens. To me, at least. Where has all those words, i learnt by flipping thru the pages of kamus dewan? Prolly, it's time to hunt down where I kept those books. Must be somewhere la.

Had the combine trng. Ok, Wani, confem ko akan ckp aku "kebeloan" kan? Yelah, aku belo. For Heaven's sake, duirng trng, something happened to me la. I couldnt describe how or what it is, but it's like "tersalep" urat 2 my neck nyer urat. Aperr cakap..Tak pe, Wani confem tau ape. Pasal dier pon penah kene. Hohoho.

Dan kerana "ahh menulis..." ni, maka, tak dapatlah saya sempurnakan hajat saya untuk me-revamp blog saya & the boyfie. Dan sebenarnyer, saya ada sesuatu untuk dicoretkan disini, lantaran sibok bersembang dengan mika2 di rumah, saya pun terlupa.

Oh my god, oh my god.. I nid my brains backk... While praying and getting my brains back, I'm looking forward to...:

Cookie-making session on Fri 13/10
Iftar PST-Nira on Tues 17/10 (i ain't that sure abt this. money matters again)
SIP briefing on 19/10
JB on 21/10
Start of SIP 23/10
Hari Raya!!! on 24/10
14th month on 24/10 (tk penting siak ni. pasal nk genapkan no.7 pey pasal)

and, ain loves yoyot boyot.

2006-10-07T22:14:00.000+08:00

See how that tail has grown so long?

Had my Thaksin Beef Noodle with the boyfie 4 break fast. Why Thaksin, don't ask me. It was delicious as ever, but now that they've changed staff; the makcik who works there, indeed worked very slowly. Menduga kesabaran. Thank God, we didn't eat out.

And since went back home, I'm alone again. Trying to write, but to no avail. Writer's block, i guess. Nothing to entertain me. At least he's nice enough to accompany this poor girl break-fast.

All's out. Twins went out with friends. Rwin went out with the girl. Uz's working. The folks went to a so-called birthday kenduri. Enough said about that. Wished was out with Jentz~ apparently, err nvm. Damn broke la.

Ok, nak menulis. Thank u, bebeh.

2006-10-07T02:28:00.000+08:00

Kalo la aku ni anak orang kaya. Bak kata Lela "filthy rich".. Cepatlah dapat keje, pastu bole beli ape aku nak, jadi tak yah mintak mak bapak pasal dorang confem pk kiter nk buang duit dorang, WAIT~ Money's meant to be spent ok.

But at least I am contented with what I have. Though i may be almost everyday broke-n. At least my parents don't have to pick me up from anywhere i'd call a place to study or whatever. Or be too worried for me. At least i am not like YOU. Though i can't stay out too late, at least i dun hafta lie saying i'm going "study" when i'm meeting my boyfie!! Hahahahaha.

**ok. i feel better now. yg rase2 tau, nk tau apsal, lungsuri ke tanye_ain_sendiri.com.

Different walks of life.

2006-10-05T15:12:00.000+08:00

I have a wish for this Syawal.

Anyway, ytd met Sisy to continue our search for a new pair of kasut. After our delicious break fast meal @ Banquet Clifford; I ate Slice Fish Noodle & Sissy got Banmian. Kan bagus seme gi iftar @ Banquet. Nak g mahe2 la ape la.

So, we couldn't find any @ Raffles Place. We headed down to City Hall. Walked through City Link Mall. Still couldn't any. Went into countless of shops. Charles & Keith, VNC, Novo, URS. Before going to Suntec, we decided to go Marina. Same shops again. Then we walked into Everbest. Name pon Everbest, tk sedap. Then the style of the shoes d0esn't interest us. WOrst of all, the price. OMG!! Ok, rule that out. On our way out to Suntec, there's one more shop. We gave it a try. And it's like OMG!! I instantaneously fell in love with this particlar pair. Hoho. And I think, I'm falling in love with this label. Finally I got my pair. And after continuous walks @ Suntec, Sissy decided to get the same design.

Gorgeously, purely white. Wee~

So we headed back. Decided to take the train to Simei. Abe kan, dlm train, people from all walks of life we met.

That lady highlighted, or rather in that limelight, made our heads turned. And apparently, err... laughed. What caught my attention was, her shoes, Lawa giler babs punyer. As my eyes travelled upwards, I was appalled to see that the owner and the shoes don't match. Ok, at least she knows style.

Then, we spot her hands were like drumming. And her head nodding. Dgr2 syok sendiri. Dlm train. Sowang2. Haha. CoolShit arh she.

My Heart

2006-10-03T04:42:00.000+08:00

I tink i'm down with insomnia. I couldn't sleep; thus making this my 2nd entry of the day. Been listening to this song for quite awhile.Other than the song itself, the lyrics touched me deeply just now.

Then I began to tink. Not too deep. Certain things made me ponder. Certain things made me realise alot of things. It's in fact, funny how certain things changed so abruptly. Is it just me, or maybe the other party(ies)?

Just 4 songs made me think too much, i supposed. All, made me reflect it back to u. Cuz 3 of which, is urs. The ones you wrote and sang. For me. Are things really becoming too distant, or we are making that up? Is this world changing, or it is really us? Been days of missing -eu. Been days of wondering what had happen to -eu. Been days of countless reflecting. Been days of keeping the voice that gave me emotions, away. No, I am not gonna ask whose fault. Let it be ours.

Will it be days of me, waiting again? Waiting for that same old chap, to be back,laughing with me? I dunnoe what went wrong. I tried so hard to make things ok; by not being that "prangai" me. Now, it is just "prangai" or is it ego?

"Bila kita mencintai yang lain
Mungkin kah hati ini akan tegar
Sebisa mungkin tak akan pernah
Sayang ku akan hilang

If u love somebody
Could we be this strong
I will fight to win
Our love will conquer all
Wouldn’t reach my love
Even just one night
Our love will stay in my heart
My heart" - My Heart (Irwansyah & Acha)

So near. Yet distancing?

Kuih Bulan

2006-10-02T23:16:00.000+08:00

I am feasting on MOONCAKES!!! Yippieness!! Sissy gave me Pure Lotus mooncake & White Lotus Double Yolk mooncake. So, i cut nicely into pieces; konon nk share ngan yang lain. And till now, i remembered twin shared a piece. I've been chewing on the rest slowly. Savouring the taste. Woo-hoo!

Ok, da~ Nak tgk Grey's Anatomy.

My Saturday

2006-10-01T00:44:00.000+08:00

And so, gone is my 1st Saturday of Ramadan. And A week of fasting has past. I survived. And hope you too, did.

I was a happy girl, today. Thanx to the twins. I never any older when going out with them. And so, finally, the twins have gotten their preparations ready for Hari Raya. Yeayness!

These are the PAINTERS. Esp Mama; clad only in her baju tdo n cap. Haha. OK, half done; another half tommorow.

We had a lot of fun. Just the 3 of us. And they always make my day. I have to be happy, right? So, after buka, off we went to search for their new bags. After rounds of comtemplating, the twins finally settled for the same bag. Kata twins, kan? So, we headed to McD. The place we've been anticipating for. Imagine ar, our main purpose to go out, is to look for their bags, but on our minds, we were picturing McD.

Had our sumptious meal. My pre pre-dawn meal. I remembered I had Mc Spicy Meal, with free apple pie and extra corncup. (I wonder why is it not called cup corn, lyk the pasar malam one..)

Masa tgh mkn tu, tetiba kite ter-notice satu family ni. Bangsa cina arh. Just a normal family, with parents and 1 daughter and 1 son.

Nampak tak yg dibelakang itu? We nicknamed them "The Thrifty Family". Naseb baik anak dier tk dpt Happy Meal. They won't be as happy as us. Cuz, we don't have to buy Happy Meal, but we eat like we're the happiest people there. Kan da mcm makan Happy Meal.

Ok, back to them. Why we named them that, cuz, we had noticed that the parents just bought a single meal. Imagine the 3 of us, each buying the same as them, and mine with added corn cup. So, you'd imagine what happen to the kids, right? Or, who's eating what, perhaps?

The mother ate Big Mac; korang pon bole agak la. The father ate fries. Btw, they bought upsize. Then there's the free item, right? Ok, the 6-piece nuggets were shared equally among the son & daughter. But the daughter, maybe seeing the mother ate alot, she bugged for a corn cup. Or maybe, seeing that I had a corn cup. So, the kids shared the nuggets and corn cup. Ouh, as for the drinks, people, look carefully. If you expect them to have 4 straws sticking out, NO. You'll actually see 4 small cups. The father poured their drinks into the cups. How sweet. And they ate happily ever after, I supposed.

Very thrifty, uh? You can view my pix @ Fotopages (peekaboobs:applesauce) or Zorpia.

Maybe you think, I didn't care enough or understand enough. But I do, too. Too much.

That MSN reminder thingy.

2006-09-30T01:05:00.000+08:00

Have you guys ever seen this reminder?

Do you think it is really true? Ok, I'm very doubtful when things involve money. Here's my doubts. If MSN really wanna make us pay for our hotmail accounts, why didn't the management send this message or reminder to all hotmail/msn users? I am sure they'd want to remind us about this big change, right? And, if really this is from MSN Accts Coordinator, now with the advancement of technology, why didnt MSN make a system whereby, those who has received that dumb reminder will not receive it any further?

I remembered I only forward once. And as I received more, over time, I became dubious of the whole reminder. And, I actually went into the reccommended site. Not one, but two. Feel free to click this link. BBC News and InternetNews

Both sites did mention about that big change coming our way, but neither mention about us having to pay for our account. Mr Neil Holloway said, "We will build extra services into MSN and start monetising this within a year ". And enough said, here's the best part. Open your eyes bigger, dudes. Read well, yea...And be sure to plant this into your minds.

The site also mentioned, "But Mr Holloway told the paper that he thinks people will be prepared to pay about £60 a year for extra services. Microsoft stresses that the site's core facilities including Hotmail will remain free. Fees will be demanded for extra services that are now under development, such as an advanced filter system to protect email accounts from junk mail. ".

With this, I hope everybody who reads this will stop sending me emails of this nature. If you want to continue to do so, go on, but be sure to put my name out. Thanks.

Bie, you know I won't change my mind.

CallMEwhenyou'reSOBER.

2006-09-28T02:58:00.000+08:00

I foresee alot more stuff needs to be done. Hopefully things go alright.

And, lastly,
Happy 20th birthday, my friend. May happiness be with you. And persevere to be the best errr.. person la. At least masa bday ko ni, ko dpt good news kan. Ada jugak budak inspire nak jadi macam kao. heh.

Gumbira

2006-09-27T01:12:00.000+08:00

Gumbira kerana.. finally da dapat online.

Gumbira kerana.. finally da replenish stock mascara & lipgloss.

Gumbira kerana.. got to help the boyfie with his work. {Gawd, i knew cretivityku terhad sungguh)

Gumbira kerana.. been a good girl lately.

Gumbira kerana.. I GOT MY CASSIS ROSE ~~FRAGRANCE~~ EDT. {Tanx to Red Herring. Jengokla blog nyer. Kalo nk kawin nk tempah henna, cari la yg pakar ye...}

Gumbira kerana.. Baby Nabil so macam AYAM. And my definition of baby like AYAM is, they are soooooo chubby. Too chubby that you can't imagine how chubby.

Macam Ayammmmmmmm!!! And he's barely 2 months. Weew. Bibik Ain loves Baby Nabil..

And to those, who still want to feel or talk like an ang moh or be what you're not, I think this is true : "I think it’s the Mat thing. Do you think all Malays are Mat? It’s essentially… quite true. I mean, deep down inside, everybody I’m sure (points to Chinese female music exec) you’re an Ah Lian. A Malay girl would be a Minah, and Malay guy a Mat. Chinese guy like Jon — Ah Beng. But we just choose not to be. (big grin) " - the new SI. Extracted.

Lastly, gumbira kerana.. we're past 13 months. And every month is a record achieved for me.

Callmewhentheresjobforme

2006-09-23T23:38:00.000+08:00

OK, so.. Uzzie's got a job. DAMN. How about me????????????????

So, peeps, in case you tumble across any work, (that'll be between 24sep-23oct [or mebe b4 that?]) plz do holler me yuh. I need a job, freak. Then what the toot you'd expect me to do at home?

Down n under.

2006-09-23T21:46:00.000+08:00

Yep. While all the rest of the peeps were out, i'm like here @ home all alone. Yes, you've read right. ALL ALONE. No difference. But yeah.. Gone were the times when, there's almost everybody asking me out. Not on a date la ass. Well, eniwei, I DID go out.

Only for a while; and hell, i was home wayy too early. That's the prob with the folks u noe. Balik siang, rumah ni kosong. Ibarat ditinggal2kan. Balik lmbt, kaozzz meriam buluh tu lagi pelan la bunyi dier. Its like pot-pet-pot-pet kinda stuff. BUt old folks mahh. Wadday expect? Lemme see.. Mama go mit Papa. I dunnoe where they go. Hopefully, they bring somehing nice for this poor kid left alone at home. Rwin went to perform ~~Tawarih~~ Terawih. Uzzie went out since afternoon, to ITE openhse @ Bishan. The twins go mkn @ LJS with their friends.

And I said I DID go out.. Yep. Met Sha. And thanx to her. Cuz she treated me to LJS!!!! Muacks Muacks! Ouww.. And we missed the good old days, lunching @ Jupiter Cafe or Mensa or anywhere, and bitching about almost anybody we knew @ TP. lol. And here's a leak. Sha mixed up Sheer Romance with Secret Recipe!!!!!!!!!!!!! Chuber ekh, Sha. Sheer Romance tu tmpt dier very sheer tau. Tmpt jual lingerie. Dgr2 skrg Secret Recipe dah jual lingerie. And what? Nak beli cake kat Sheer Romance? I love the time with the MQs.

I wonder who quote this : No woman can change a man. But i remember very well, I tumbled across that phrase in Bubbles Unbound by Sarah Strohmeyer. Giddy up, guys. Admit it you all have this thing called BIG EGO-shit. Guys never wanna appear so lembek and such. Yes yes, you are indeed the white knight in shining armour.

Ok wait!!!! Twins are backkkkk. And they made me laughed just by telling their silly journey from watsons to another watsons. I just love them to the very core u noe. We fight. Check. We argue. Check. We joke too much till we fight again. Check. But we love each other.

RESUME . But no doubt, you too have your own good and bad times. And all the ladies had wanted to do, is to try console you. Calm your nerves down. You know, like trying to tell you, you should not give up, you ae important to them bla bla bla. OMG so cliche siyekk. Ok in male terms your ego, down. But they are too sensitive to comply with our words. So, that's where their femininity from their masculinity, comes from. Alahhh... kiter serupe.~ After trying hard enough, I think I've had enough. I just want side of a man where they realize their worth. {No hard feeling, anybody.}

OK OK!! Now the folks are back!!!!! Yes yes yes! Thanx Allah for fulfilling my wishes. May You bless them so I can have more of these....

And, Bie..I never stoop you low okay? Cuz, there's this thing call LOVE.

Suggest an appropriate title for this entry.

2006-09-21T18:26:00.000+08:00

Titles are random. Though some would give you a picture of what the content is about. Anyway, it is not about it.

What is with these err.. ~~teens~~ kids these days? Ni bukan nak ckp saper la kan, kau makan cili, kau pedas terasa la sendiri. Tapi memandang korang tu pon 'feeling2' korang cinone manentah, so tu korang pey pasal la.Ok, first things first, what's with the term 'minah' or 'mat'? Isn't it so unfair to judge a person by their attire? All those makciks2 and neneks2 have this sort of tendency to call any young girl a 'minah'. Or a 'mat'. Ever heard of the terms 'mat motor', 'mat drug', 'mat geber' [pronounced gay-bay], 'minah tudung', 'minah jambu' etc? And these terms existed long before you were born.

So, just because of the newly termed 'minah/mat reps', you go around seeing all those young Malay teens especially those clad in black tops and still trying to find themselves certain identities, you call them 'minahs' or 'mats'. Get a life la.

At least, even if they are 'minah/mat', they did not go around destroying your lives. Did they pick a fight with you? NO. They were minding their own businesses, yet you were like pointing around labeling them 'minah/mat'. Halo, put this into your own brains la. You might never know people walking pass by you and calling you 'minahs' as well. And even if they're really 'minahs' or 'mats' they still do deserve some respect. Doesn't mean they dressed up like some 'minah reps' or 'mat reps', they are 'hanyut' kinda people. They may also be well-educated. Tu pasal dorang pon tau guna friendster la, my space la, neatvibe la, hi5 la, everyonesconected la etc etc. {lama siakk everyonesconnected. ntah ader lagik tak acct aku tu..}

Even if they are 'hanyut' or comes from poor family background, all the more, if you don't wish to be their friends, at least respect them as human beings la. So what you come from a well-to-do family? So what you can have whatever you want, from daddy and mummy? Sometimes, your parents don't trust you to the extend that you have to lie, just so you could go out and enjoy with friends, right? *i see guilty faces!!!*

Now, that's the trouble I have with rich, spoiled kids. They love to stereotype people. It's a shame to have that 'MALAY' or any other races such as 'BOYANESE' or 'JAVANESE' etc labelled in your NRIC. If you are my relatives, I wish I don't have any relatives like you. Mak kau masak tetap letak belacan la.. cukup garam ajinomoto sumer. Ntah ape la silap mak kau mase mengandungkan kau sampai dapat anak macam ni. Nama jer Melayu. Perangai me-layu. Nak hidup cara barat, bobal feeling bangsa tionghua {zappp.. tionghua or wat}..

No one stops you from being so westernized or whatever, but at least, remember where you come from. Susur-galur salasiah keturunan datok nenek kau, tetap melayu. So, still keen to give me a definition of a "minah" or "mat" or maybe your own definition of how a normal Malay teens should wear? *Pakai baju kurung suahh. Confem tkde org panggil 'minah'. Limit2 kene panggil 'minah kental'; and kental means strong* hahaha.

Ok, dahh.. Tak baik bulan Ramadan nk pendam2 rasa. Jadi biarku let go sblom Ramadan. Acct aku yg berlambak dan sedari dulu aku tk update, dah pon aku update. Penggemar Friendster masih boleh terus cari aku di sana. Penggemar MySpace, Neatvibe, Tagged, Zorpia, Hi5 dan aku tak tau brape bnyk lagi acct dekat lelaman sedemikian rupa yang aku ada, tapi chuber la carik2.. Mane tau jumpe. Bole blg aku ye..

So, I am faggot.

Speakin of..

2006-09-20T16:05:00.000+08:00

Hari Raya? Random. Well, speaking of that, I wonder yuh, being in my last teens year, do I get as much as I got a decade ago? Sissy & myself were like discussing some things about hantaran stuffs la, over Haloscan. It started with me, in love with window-shopping bla bla bla. Then it comes to us wanting to use a clutch. {Yea, Fish, you're not the only one. Clutch/wristlet are in.} Then topic jumped to Hari Raya. Duh. And we're like talking about duit raya... Here it goes;

Macam siyekk. To the extend of showing my student pass. Imagine ekh, the older folks all sibok bermaafan, then there I was, sibok kluarkn student pass. Then when I want to salam, mintak maaf cum tunjuk student pass. Ala2 zaman tunjuk bus pass kat apek bus. I AM STILL ELIGIBLE!! pale hotak laa. Ok wat..

And I had a dream. A wonderful dream that caused me to wake up late. Of course la kan. It's a yummey dream some more. I dreamt we (the families and the boyfie) went to Mad Jack Cafe to iftar. {Dgr2 blom pose da feeling iftar ekh. Chuber ekh, Ain. Asek mkn jerrr..} And Mad Jack Cafe is an Aussie cafe (ader alfresco jugak!!!!) which is located somewhere @ Bukit Timah there.

I must have been looking at the menu now too often that I dreamt of it. I dunnoe how I knew It was MJC, but the food they served somehow made me overconfident that, it was Mad Jack Cafe. I had..

this burger set. Dammit the fries so yummeyy. You should have seen the menu.. Ouhh drooling.

And this brownie. Reminded me so much of the brownie I had @ Fish & Co. OMG!

The best part of this dream was that, in reality, I have never been to Mad Jack Cafe before, in my entire life. But if any of you plans to go, it's @ Duke's Road, somewhere near Farrer Road & Adam Road. It's along Bukit Timah Road, towards Crown Centre & Coronation Plaza. Haha. Sounds like I've been there, but no.

This girl is so full of dreams and fantasy.... And I jolly well need a new blogskin!!!! Maybe I can do myself some good, by not sleeping aftr Subuh, during Ramadan. That way, I can try change my body clock and get use to waking up early. And the boyfie needs a new one as well. Probably, I do a new one for him first. Somehow, I could not get things started.. Heh.

Itching for Victoria's Secret Pure Seduction.

I still heart u. And Bie, what a girl wants, is what a girl needs.

INM KL Trip

2006-09-19T16:27:00.000+08:00

Yuh, and as the title mention. Darn it siak. I only got to know about it when I went to OLE to check things out. And ta da~ The dateline is today. What the toot. Its a 5 days, 4 nights trip, $280 inclusive of meals. So it's 6-10 oct. BUlan pose. Anyway, to begin with, not like the parents will let me go, right? Besides, I am not some rich, spoiled brats. hurhur.

The sour grape, but this time, mango.

Window-shopping is the best eye remedy.

2006-09-19T00:29:00.000+08:00

As the title mention. Went to pay NLB a visit after sucha long time. I love NLB. Since the day the INM people went to the site visit. I love it. Especially the top floor. What a panorama.

Met up with Laini. It took me quite some time to realize that we wore similar outfit today. People around must have been thinking that we had planned to wear the same stuff. Since I'm in no mood to take pictures, just visualize yuh. We wore grey tudungs; different fabric though. We wore black top paired with a pair of jeans. Laini got a Neckermann footwear, whereas myself, a pair of Papillios. We even carried black totes. How cute coincidences can be!

After some time in NLB, we head on to have some food. DESPITE both has had lunch before going out. After rattling and walking ~~to and fro~~ in front of BK, LJS, KFC & McD, we settled on LJS, being our favourite fast food restaurant. Yeayness!!

I was quite irritated by this group of err teenagers?, next to me. Ok, so I ignore them. But I couldn't help thinking why would they look at us strangely right? And only now did I realize. We wore similar outfits. Maybe these group was like thinking "Eh ni minah tudung confem janji ekh pakai same2." Takmo macam paham arh. Dgr2 aku minah tudung pe. Dgr2 sumer "minah tuds" pakai seme sama pe. Ekh tu kakak ipar bini abang kao jer pakai gitu. Hah. Not that I was being over-paranoid, but yuh, they kept looking la kan.Cam toot gitu. Benci I.

And I supposed, Noor Rafili the silat guy, thought that way too, when we made our way out to the door. But i managed a smirk. I dunnoe why, but that poor guy didn't do anything to deserve a smirk from me. Hahah.

Here comes the best part. We did not know where to head. Thinking about surveying some new dyes, I thought we'd head up to Watsons. But we ended up surveying cosmetics. Ouh vanity cursed itself upon me!! Which reminded me very much of my undying love for nude colour lipgloss or lipstick. {I managed to get a new gloss from Missha} And I had better get a nude color one soon. Ouh and my mascara is running our of stock as well. So do my unconditional love for Burberry Brit & first love for Davidoff Game. Urghhhh. {Reminder: I was NOT born with a silver spoon.}

This girl live a life full of fantasies uh.

From dyes to cosmetics, lastly we ended up window-shopping for what we call a Hari Raya Shopping. Hehs. I can't wait to try on my new outfits!!! Myself and twins were thinking of getting white heels and bags. But I'd prefer wristlet or clutch. The bigger the bag is, the more item I'd put inside, the heavier my bag becomes. Goodness, I've found some that interest me. But then, when there's no white that left, I wouldn't mind putting on brown. Black would be my last resort. Let's hope for a better Ramadan and Syawal.

To end this, here's an Arabic poetry:

"Nak buat baik, sangatlah mudah, Maniskan wajah, lembutkan lidah." - Maniskan wajah meaning not to doll yourself up, but just a simple smile would do. And lembutkan lidah simply means, not to sing or sweet talk, but simply say the nice things.

The "penutup"

2006-09-17T19:33:00.000+08:00

Today marked the official last day of performance for us, before Ramadan comes. It was tiring was me, although the weather was breezy. I supposed, it is the waiting time of performance that matters. So after performance, we had the annual routine of doa selamat, that mark the closure of our routine performance.

I fell asleep, on what I thought was a nap, awhile ago.

I soo want more Birkis!!! Especially from the 2007 collection.

Check out Yahooo Auction for more of these. Or, these.

Don't leave me hanging, love.

The Pit - Ain's Perspective

2006-09-16T22:28:00.000+08:00

Sounds familiar? *cheeky*

So, Lela "sleptover" and we spent the night bitching. I didnt know I still had that capability, since MQs (Sha, i thinkk that's what we're called. Or perhaps, WASP??) last bitchin session. I missed bitching with the GFs. So, back to main, we bitched. About this and that, about making the whole thing come to live, making plans and stuff. Those were the days. To think we didn't sleep through the night, we thought we could do with some "eye-rest" and have planned to wake up @ 9am, to help Mama with marketing. Apparently, we both overslept till noon.

Take our time, and done with our other side shopping like the fruits and stuff, when Miza called to ask if we were ready or not. OMG, we were like only about to start with our cooking. I dealt with Maggi Pizzas and Lela, Roti Boyan. Imagine ekh, 2 anak dara bekerja di dapur. Ouh tunggang-langgang. Sempat la pulak, nk feeling siapkn makan untuk picnic ngan family nanti da besar. Ouww touching..

We reached the pit. Then gedebak -gedebuk, they started fire, let those who had been long waiting for us, eat. It was quite mendak initially. Da macam tgh berkabung. Yes, right. Most clad in black, duduk berkecah.. Warm up over, we played games, starting with murderer. I bet it is the easiest, yet still fun to be played kinda game, no matter how many times you've played before.

I felt like something not right. I personally do not know what. But I feel there was something missing during those time. Reminder, this is MY perspective. Nevertheless, I managed to keep to my own personal vow, and maintained. (haha..but not for long) Laughed here and there. I was very happy. I was a happy girl, playing games. Enjoyed being made fun of. Hey, it's pit okay. There's no reason for us not to be a sport right? Wani & I were given a stupid forfeit, for being unlucky. Minah Rempit & Tp. Yelah, bila lagi nak buat keje bodoh kan? So I was up to it.

Soon, the games ended with Chop Chilli Chop. Call me outdated, but I swear I've never played the game before. And I played well, for an amateur like me. Terusik lagi hati ini, bila dah mula sendirian. One by one the girls go back. And some came, like Caca. How I wished the other seniors were there; Ais, Saj, As, Farna, etc etc. I miss them loads. Soon, most of them are gone. Dan aku pun, sesungguhnyer, Peah, makinlah mangkok.

Mangkok Tingkat vs Tuppaware Tingkat
I was already feeling so mangkok. So, there I go. To the breakwaters or waterbreaker, whatever these ppl call it. So much for being a Pure Geog student. We sang. We chatted. Then came one part, we wandered along. All three were drained in their own thoughts. I was praying hard he'd be abel to make it. If not, I'd mangkok till morning.

Leaving the mangkokness and after doin some yoga technics n oxygen technics, suddenly we sang again. Be merry. Yeah. Sadly, there's no stars as it's too cloudy. How i wished I could stargaze. I miss stargazing.. At least, my mangkokness, did not define childish, in terms of Tuppaware tingkat. {Ouh Mariah, I missed you, for defining such term}.

When they came back, they leftover people had their game of murderer. Lepas tu, konon nk feeling cerita hantu la ekh. Kebabai. Nothing at all. Last2 citer merepek. And some went off. Its becoming boring, yet exciting at the same time.

Highlight of the whole event, would be, the time Fid, Yan,Lela, Yat & myself went hunting. Though not much of discovery.. Yelah aku kan bongok. Bukan salu dpt g hunting. Kalo siang2 bukannye bnyk discovery. Are there?

SO, our PST/NIRA pit ended there, with the same old faces again. I hope, all of you has had fun. Jangan serik2 la ye.. And BIG thanks to all those involved directly, or indirectly, especially those who had stayed through. Thanks for complimenting on my Maggi Pizza & Roti Boyan. And to fid, for the transport. And to the boyfriend, for coming and made my day again. Ok, enough. As if I was the organiser la pulak.

p/s: Remp-It's okay.

My thursday ramblings.

2006-09-15T00:32:00.000+08:00

I have been sitting ard the whole afternoon. Waited for rwin's msg whether going visit Mak @ hospital or not. Tgu mcm buah tk jatoh la kanz.. I loike.

Then the time come. Right when I was reading MANJA. Err.. yuh, i was reading Manja. Tired of novels. So Mama brought back Manja, and I thought I could do with some manja-ing ard. Uh?? Ape cakap ni? But, for once, I itched for $$$$ again. Damn. I saw an Esprit watch la siakk. Cantik giler babs. Ok, FYI, i am only fit to wear expensive watches. Not trying to sound lyk some spoiled brat, but i really cant wear all those cheapo watches @ pasar malam or bugis street selling for $10 per watch. I cant.

So shall add on to my never-ending wishlist, which I know things will never be fulfilled. But I add on, anyway. Back to the Esprit watch. Last Manja I saw this one freaking nice Esprit (again) watch. Its so feminine. Total opposite of me. But it's nice. And it was SGD98.00. Then come this new watch, i think ard SGD145.00 gitu lek. How I wish I was bron with silver-spoon to get that watch. OR some jobs would really wanna take me in, just to buy that watch. No, just to fulfil my entire wishlist yang tak mungkin akan singkat, tapi meningkat. Wow.

Ah yelahh.. Dgr2 aku dah side-track. Ok i miss the makcik kepos, namely, Sha, Hannah and Kay.. Shall we go buka one day?? Ok, dgr2 speaking of this, aku mcm rase ramai org aku ajak gi buka luar. Macam la aku ni bnyk duit.

*SIDE-TRACKED* Back to what I was saying, so Uz n myself went to visit Mak @ Changi. And you know what? CGH has changed alot. The 7-11 has changed to the opposite side. Nevertheless, the 7-11 @ CGH cannot be compared to SGH's 7-11, where it was all Heaven. There's almost nothing for me to buy. Had wanted to buy the fishball, den no chilli. Wat the toot, kan? Then I ended up buying the spring roll, but it was spoilt. BASI!! Bongok pey kedai. So I wasted my 85 cents. Beh kan, I ended up (again) buying a pink colour doughnut. I hate pink, but i dun care. Pink stuffs are good to eat, though. Just dun ever buy me pink cake, cuz i dun like it.

I think i am not too late, to congratulate one of the seniors; Yati & Khai. Da nikah tk blggggg. Its so fun to see friends all getting hitched.. This is what in my mind..

Ain: Mama!!! Umi!!! Nak kahwin!! (Mommy!!! I wanna get married!!!)
Mommy: Eh anak bertuah ni.. Kasi mkn orang tua blom lagi, nk kahwin. (This kid.. Have yet to provide for us, still want to get married)
Ain: Haiyyyyahhh...

Menjeng la pulak si Ain ni. Ain will get married when time is ripe and right. But not too soon, though. Tunggu la lagi 7 8 thn. I got a long way to go, okay...

RIGHT NOW.

Alot of things in my mind. Hours before the pit. Hours before i'm starting to make Roti Boyan and Maggi pizza... And i think I still need to revise some stuff to bring tmr. Dunnoe if the boyfriend is coming or not. I wont put much hope into it, cuz, lesson learnt. I am ~~not~~ VERY understanding. So, i deem, he maybe tired and not even drop by, though he mentioned in ytd's msg, he will.

And whether the pit will turn out ok or not, let's not expect too much out of it la kan.. Cuz, personally, a too well planned occasion will likely be spoiled. Judging from past experiences la kan..

And i just said so...

Hahaha.. Kerana mls, kan.. aku pon smrang pok arh kat bdk. At least tikar manja ok pe. Sui2 dudok romantik ber2 jer.. Aku da bwk mkanan.. Barang2 aku jer berlambak ekh. Ibarat kata mama, mcm nk g belayar. *bedek! buek* Before i'm gone, to give way to niecey blog la pulakk.. {Didnt noe she's got one. Gonna look it up, someday!! Hahaha. AKu bab nk cari blgo2 org ni, malas bebenor. Harapkan B+ jer for Information Services.} OK, so here's to Fasha!!!!

Happy 17th Birthday, sweets! I adore to the very much sia. She looked like Ifah. Hahaha. Ok, lain. But Ifah mok oso got that cheeks. May your birthday be blessed with the best things in life. And, be the best daughter to your parents, okayyy.. Ouh, I'd pray that you would talk more during trng.. Takmo shy2 lagi, k. Shy2 t rugi bnyk. Muackks.

P/s: love me, do you??? I do.

2006-09-14T01:15:00.000+08:00

Rase mcm nk paitao jer... Asal ekh aku tk rase seperti mane yg lain2 rase kan..?? Sikit pon tak rase. Sebaliknyer, aku membayang apa yg bakal berlaku. Sebaliknyer, aku lebih mengharapkan perkara lain berlaku. Mungkinkah terjadi?

Hanya satu perkara yang akan buat aku gembira. Dan hanya seorang saja yang tahu sebabnya. Andainya persoalan terjawab. Jadi.. nantikan la ekh. Sampai buah tak jatuh. Sampai malam makin gelap, dingin malam menyelubungi.. Sampai bulan terus ketawakan aku.

Belajar dari kesilapan lalu: jangan terlalu mengharap. Alaaa sama la tu dengan berhenti berharap.

Dan kadang kala, bujukan itu sekadar untuk menenangkan hati seseorang...

survived.

2006-09-13T17:52:00.000+08:00

I've cleared ALL my papers in school. And suprisingly a B for BPRT. Of course it's a surprise, cuz i remembered i lost a full 11 marks ++ for the main paper, due to insufficient time. But i guess, my CA pulled me up. Well anyway, no more classes, lectures, projects!!

Just a note to all those Hady fans, and errr fanatics.

Support Hady, and if he goes to the Finals, you will get to see him @ TP this Friday (15 Sept), 3pm, Plaza. And you will have a chance to see yourself in the preview episode next week. NOW, that is, IF ONLY you ppl will vote him to get into the Final round of S.I. He'll b there with the other finalist as well.

So, watch S.I tonight and support Hady lorr.. Ok, i've done my part to spread the word.

worry.

2006-09-13T01:38:00.000+08:00

Questions playin in my mind. {yea.. but not the song..} I am worried over too many things. Myself, and people around me, that I love. Is it me, or you? Or maybe, my pms? Everything is totally different now. Does our past really matters? Will the past affect the present and be a restraining factor against the future? It seems to me that our past really affect our mindset. Or at least the way we think, in some general prospects.

Then, there's the friends. Old, and new. The old friendships slowly drifted apart. And the new ones, are becoming more complex. Is it because 1 has not been truthful enough about oneself or sincere enough? Or is it that people has been too comfortable with the portrayed "YOU", rather than the real you; that they tend to whine, bitch or whatever it takes, to get the "YOU" that they thought they really knew?

It is sad... To see friendships drifting apart. To see the bonds we had all created, perish just like that.

Do we really know how a friend feel? Do we really need to snap back when someone pointed that small mistake?

Some of us, may not wanna care or, be bothered about what others think. But, don't you think that, that way will even make other be wary of you? But to clear the air, when both or all parties are fuming with madness, all thinking they are right?

Am i selfish, or are you, too?

Dear friends, currently, my blog cant b viewed. The I.E prompt window, bugs me to close my (blog) window. Any idea why? Only apply to my blog. But not others. So, tag me @ my comments ya. Thanks.

Sinful Indulgence

2006-09-11T00:48:00.000+08:00

weeee~ Had lotsa fun enjoyin our sinful indulgence @ Temptation Island. I swear i am going again, and again, and again..I supposed, we spent more time cam-whoring, than taking the photos of the yummey ice melting desserts. But, best of all, they made my day. We laughed our way through.. I want this to repeat again!! Yeayness!

Alahhh bnyk sgt arh... pandai2 arh tgk sendiri pat fotopages.

And now.. to these 3 people.. a big happy birthday to them.

Abg Awie, Uzzie & Shikin.

May you people did enjoy splendid birthdays!

Lelaki...kenapa kau begitu ego?

I may seem redundant, but what is wrong of showing that I care?

we haf a fair share of musibats agongs in life

2006-09-08T22:06:00.000+08:00

The trouble with not trusting people is, you will always and never fail to spend the time alone. Then again, i'd rather be a little bit too careful and mindful, than too helpful and nice. Lesson learnt over and over and over again.

This ever so cliche words of wisdom, and boredom.. "Kawan ketawa ramai, kawan susah..." A quote from YtC's blog, "wen u have money dey came in swamp..". How true. But only thing is, I will never haf money. That doesn't mean. These musibats agongs will still come tumbling looking for this Ain cuz she will help them. Tak mintak budi dibalas, tapi perangai takmo mcm chitoot arh. Rambutan btol.

OK, da bes luahkan bingit.

Laugh at me, c'mon.. but.. bilakah lagi sayang, kita bertemu....

Boyan food

2006-09-07T15:00:00.000+08:00

So while staying at home, I've been eating Roti Boyan. So, soon gemok la. Happy per tk keje, mkn tdo jer. Not to forget tgk tv. Beh skrg tgh mkn roti boyan, tgk citer Bawang Merah Bawang Putih. Benci siak tghk citer bnyk org jahat. Mcm nk bunuh jer.. Emosi la pulakk.

Aii Shite Ru

2006-09-06T23:44:00.000+08:00

Kadangkala..
Kau perlihatkan dirimu begitu jahil
Walhal kau sebenar bijak

Kadangkala..
Kau diperlekehkan mereka
Walhal kau lebih licik

Kadangkala..
Amarahmu berkecamuk tanpa simpati
Namun harga diri itu melebihi segalanya

Kadangkala..
Diammu menguburi soalan tanpa jawaban
Lalu meninggalkanku kebingungan.

Aku benci..

Berada di dalam liku hidup sebegini

Terus-terusan menjadi bak boneka dalam pasungan

Tanpa punya suara untuk membidas kekata kejammu

Hanya untuk patuh, mengalah, berserah tanda kalah

Mengharapkan sekelumit rasa simpati

Simpati demi menghentikan segalanya dari terus berkuasa

Simpati demi menyatukan apa yang telah lama terpisah.

Aku benci..
Jasad kita semakin jauh,
Apakah emosi kita utuh mengalahkan logika?

Hot stuff are meant to be shared

2006-09-05T01:57:00.000+08:00

in the blog or web only.

So click it. If you wanna listen to the content of PeeYesTee's a few days back. A pity there isn't any vid. You might love it.

Pardon the unwanted noises. Tried to reduce some of it, though.

ENJOYs!

Cravings.

2006-09-04T23:25:00.000+08:00

I am so craving mooncakes right now. Thanks to sissy for sending me an email order form for mooncakes.

Champion..PeeYesTee

2006-09-04T00:44:00.000+08:00

First n foremost la kan.. CONGRATULATIONS to PeeYesTee for the title. {like finally} Chak tak deng..bolot!!

Overall Champion: PeeYestee (TP)
1st Runner-up: Adiratna (NP)
2nd Runner-up: Bertara (NYP)

Individual prizes (not including the harapans cuz i had forgotten):
Kesenian Terbaik,
Awak2 Terbaik,
Paluan Terbaik,
Lirik ciptaan asli Terbaik,
Lagu ciptaan asli Terbaik,
Tukang Karut Terbaik,
Juara Terbaik

PeeYesTee. aka Panjy Sri Temasek

An almost flawless performance.

*Nelayan Selatan is back. The intro brought back memories.

Speaking of champion or success of a group, reminds me of the recent AGM we had last sat. "We are ONE because of the friendship we have and treasure". And I sincerely, think it's true. But sadly, there never fails to have any conflict, gaps watever la kans. Not just a particular group, no not pinpointing. Juz generalizing. That is what has been happening to each organization I am involved with. It is a sad thing to see gaps not just between cliques, but rather individuals themselves. *shrugs* So, should I induce that PeeYesTee succeed because of the strong friendship and that they put away all grudges for the sake of PeeYesTee?

I don't know. When I reflect, dikir barat -> friendship -> sahabat/musibat.Is that it? *sigh* JMP, u may say. BUt it make sense to me. Ok, it's not just dikir barat, ok. Say its kompang or tarian.. everywhere i go, it seems to work that way. How sad. A lot of things are running through my head. Dk, friendship, sip, work.. How does a 19-year-old mind or brains work? Or think?

Yeah, friendship is a bliss, yet a killer. Of which, I feel blessed with friends. But when a friendship is dying, i began to think, what went wrong? Being the paranoid me, I will always tend to put myself into this position where I'd think "have I wrong him/her"? I love my friends. If you think you know me, save ur words, cuz, you will only know Ain and begin accepting her as she is, when you have seen her alter egos and many different dimension of her attitudes. And I think, it goes the same to all of us. Eh, i beg to differ. I got ultimate alter egos ok. Ok, so I am not someone to judge myself.So it's rather up to you to judge me. BUt I know myself well, though some may say they have my interests at heart. {touching nyerrrr}

Back to topic, I think it all relates back to the 7 deadly sins uh.. Think, peeps. If the theory of dikir barat -> friendship -> sahabat/musibat is really true or it works, dat is how the girls and i have to go through? I admit, I am NOT the best leader ever. She went away at the moment when I need her to guide me. And I am boring, u noe. So uhhh yeahh.. will I get them to corporate with me, at least till the annual production? AT LEAST? Ok ok.. tell me, peeps. Am I realllllllly unfriendly?? Cuz, that is one of the errrr silly reason I've heard. Smarang hangpa laaa nohh.

A killer it is, but friends come and go, right? Those who really now you and treasure you and you too like wise may not be many. But along the way, you will always meet new people, with similar or better attitudes, who knows.. I think I'm really used to being left by friends. Terlajak perahu boleh ditarik, terlajak kata??? (eh?? pardon me for my rusty so-called A1 Malay n HML ekh)Nonetheless, we all make mistakes. Allah the Great has created mankind a unique individual with something beautiful in them. Den again, always remember, lyk Achiok used to say, when you're up there, you easily come tumbling down. Buat ape kan?

Yelahhh.. sblom aku di label perangai, macam-paham, "yoyork orh", macam bekbekkk lagi, baik ku stop. Eh bedah, dah tu, kalo nk meriahkan lagi entry ku ini, jgn pulak nk comment kat taggy yerr. Part mana tkpaham ni?? Kan ader COMMENT yg tertera di bawah.

Chitootan.